Saturday, July 25, 2009

everybody loves a train wreck -


at least that's what i was told. it wasn't meant as a negative response. but it made sense. moreso recently then at the time actually. (it was said in reference to my blog, just so ya know)

anyhow. i see that. maybe i've seen it for a long time, and just didn't notice. but i do now.

i also see that perhaps my life is a train wreck.... whether i allow it to get that way, or circumstances take me there. i have never been kept down. i have been derailed, even crushed like a penny left on the tracks at times. but i have always.... i do always.. put a shine back on and roll on down the tracks. i don't stay down for long. ever.

call it stubborn. call it inspiring. call it bullshit. i don't care.

but right now--- call me a bitch if you want to, but i've had enough.

enough of the --- well everything.

in my real life...and my blog life-- which y'all know-- is the same.
i don't throw bullshit around in either.

i can't shut down my life here in the real world---

but as for this blog --- i can. and i am.

i really have had enough of it. layin my blood, sweat, tears, and heart out on these pages--- only to be left in a daze when someone i don't even know says something off the wall. or worse-- someone i DO know-- says nothing at all... or even more challenging.

no need to wait for the collision here. because train wreck or not--- as always--- i'll get up and walk away, just like i have always done. setting my dented up little train back on the tracks.. and movin on down the road. a little bit stronger than i was before.

take care y'all....
it's been real-
or has it?


24 comments:

EE said...

Soul-
Our lives are all "trainwrecks". Unlike you, most of us just aren't honest or forthright (sp?) about it on our blogs.
Please don't quit writing... I would miss you terribly!!!!
Hang in there...

Smocha said...

She's right...everyone's life is their own personal train wreck.

Your blog is too good to give up!

Love me

Golden To Silver Val said...

We love you Soul because you're real. If I wanted a constant happy wappy reading experience, then I would read children's books. When we read about your troubles it makes us feel better....not that we're happy you're having problems...we're happy that WE are not the ONLY ones having problems...that there is someone else out there with problems just as bad or worse. Your blog is good for you too. It helps you vent. I know what I'm talking' about here. I'm hoping you won't stop but if you do, please continue to write your own private journal for your eyes only. It helps so much to get it out of your system.
If we don't always comment please don't take it to heart....remember people handle problems in different ways...and we all have problems of one sort or another. Some go off in a comfy spot in the corner, curl up, stay quiet and heal, others hide behind a smiley face and 'pretend' everything is ok, and others grab a soap box and bitch up a storm. We are all unique. God love us.
I wish you only the best and I will be emailing you from time to time, sending you some "Charlotte Cheer". I hope you'll answer. Better yet, I hope you'll change your mind about ending your blog. If you think you've lost popularity...I have on mine too. I think people tend to be too busy in the summer to read blogs...it'll pick up again in the Fall. Big hugs to you Soul-friend. God Bless. Love, Charlotte

ac said...

Peel back the layers on anyone's life and there will be skeletons in the closet, dirt dirt dirty dirt everywhere, and train debris scattered about torn and twisted from all the head on collisions of normal everyday life. Ed used to say, 'Nobody gets out unscathed'. It's all about how you handle it. And from what I see, you rise above and push on through and come out better for your experiences. I am in total awe of how well you do that! :) I will miss you SO MUCH if you stop writing. xoxoxo ac

Anonymous said...

Blogging is a good way to vent all the feelings bottled up inside us Soul. I use it as a great form of therapy and so do you. Who really gives a damn about what other folks think/say/comment or don't? I love those who stop by to encourage me, endure those who stop by to critique, and miss those who stop by without comment, or dont' stop by anymore at all. But I'm going to keep blogging just the same, 'cuz I do it for me. Sometimes when I don't comment it's cuz I just don't know what to say. Maybe that's true of folks visiting my blog too. I notice very few of our old gang actually comment anymore. I miss them! But know that you are always loved and in my prayers and I hope that things settle down for you in your new house and you get back to blogging soon! And by the way, I don't see your or your blog as a train wreck. You are survivor - "SOUL SURVIVOR" - remember and I know you're gonna be ok! (((HUGS)))

Angie Weid said...

Hey, you do what you have to do. Your blog has served you well. With your new home, comes a new start and perhaps ending your blog is what you need to start fresh. If you find the desire to start it back up, go for it. I'm guessing you have email addresses to keep in contact with us.

Hang in there ... Peace Baby!

Donna said...

'Ya Know, Waco's not that Far from you...is it butt kicking time???Hahaaa...
OK...but I'll continue to check just IN CASE you find you miss us too much!(((((((HUG)))))))

Mary said...

I haven't been commenting but I have been reading. Your new home is truly exciting to me. I hope you don't decide to close the blog because I'd miss it so much.

I haven't been a very good blogger myself lately. I seem to be in a haze most of the time.

Whatever happens please let's keep in touch. There's always email. I would be truly sad is I lost contact with my LBF. My ladybuy pin rides on my purse and has been visiting the doctor with me every day. He's my good luck buddy.

Jamie said...

You can't stop writing - it's what you do, and you do it so well. However, no one understands wanting to quit better than I. YOU have always been so much better at it, and you have that quality--honesty..its' hard to come by. If you quit, please email, snailmail, text, yahooooooo or homing pigeon..so I know how you are. xo Jamie

Anonymous said...

Soul don't do it. I love to come here. We all have train wrecked lives in one way or the other. Lately I have felt that I am laying flattened on the tracks waiting for another one to come by. It is just the way life is..sometimes it is good, sometimes it just sucks big time. You do have good times in your life, and things are only going to get better with this big change. Take a break if you need to. I am doing that right now because of my own battle. If you go away, I will be forever wondering about your life in that new house.

Sue.

Cheryl said...

Count me in with the rest here. I think writing is good for you. An outlet. A way to vent. And we're all only human. Everyone of us has our problems. Mine reads my blog so you just don't hear them. I hope you keep writing. I want to be involved in your life.

JLee said...

Aw Soul, don't go! Don't let one comment "derail" you. Believe me, I've had some doozies that brought me to tears, but this is YOUR space to vent and to do whatever you want, unlike real life sometimes. Maybe just take a breather and come back :)
Take care...

Raine said...

I'm sorry hun. I havent been around much. I been taking care of the grandson while my daughter goes to school and stalking my stalker etcetcetc. Please know I value the friendship I believe has come from our blogging and I will miss you. Please keep in touch.

Anonymous said...

Finally I find my way here only to see you leaving? SO life seemingly is not all about trainwrecks but about being late too.

Cheryl said...

I'm hoping, hoping that you change your mind :(

Golden To Silver Val said...

Just checkin' in and hoping that maybe you will continue to post. I'm dying to know all about your new place and your new neighbors. I'm sure you've got TONS of stuff to tell us! Also hoping that you're OK and feeling better as each day passes. I miss you. Big hugs. Charlotte.

Jamie said...

Ditto charlotte---



xo.

:)

ac said...

Just checking on you kiddo. Hope you are well and happily resting up from your move over to the new digs. I miss you butter bean. :( Hugs! ac

Brad said...

well crappity crap crap crap - serves me right for taken the summer off and neglecting my friends. I'll have to find another way to track you down - anywayz - I loves ya!

Summer said...

Not that I have been the most excellent blogger or blog friend. But..I'm so excited about your beautiful new house. I want one like it. You lucky duck!

Anonymous said...

Well, how did the move go? Are you still intact? I would love to hear how you are doing.

Jamie said...

Have you quit your puter altogether? No answer to email, here, yaHOOOOO---you okay? Not prying, just checkin. Miss you :)

xo

Anonymous said...

I miss you Soul Sis. I just do. Hope you reappear soon, and hope you survived the move ok.

ac said...

Hey kiddo, I'm north of Jacksonville tonight, around St Mary's Ga... and suddenly, I find myself thinking of you! :-)

Hope all is well in your world.

Just wanted you to know you are in my thoughts. HUGS! xoxo ac