Monday, July 20, 2009

workin offa comment here cuz i'm thinkless

(charlottes comment yesterday)

I know only too well what you're going through....well, PART of what you're going through anyway. Moving when you don't feel good could turn Mother Theresa into a bitch.


* hey there charlotte--- and whoever else is here - :))

i agree-- and i sooo don't feel good. even my friggin thighs have swollen muscle "frogs" in em. imagine my back and neck. i think even God would get mad if he felt this way.

it's strange that i spent my entire life at "home" moving all the time-- several times a year. then in the military-- every year or two. but since the pain and all started... it's just awful . i can't even say the things that go through my mind at times. and every day it just gets worse. 7, 8 , 9 hours a day of packing, sorting, cleaning, and then when i finally get to sit down or lay down or eat -- i'm expected to be sociable???
of course i'm not. i try, but i can't be. i just want to be quiet and rest. so what does it turn into ? i'm the big bad bitch.
really makes me want to continue killing myself with all this crap. not.
last night was the worst so far. both of the other souls-- guilted me, while i was in bed finally, after layin in there for half an hour wondering which dr. i should call today about this fuckin pain. but when i told soul-kid that i didn't feel like looking at school clothes on the computer---at like 9 p.m.--- ooooh, I was mommy dearest. even though, i offered to watch tv with her instead--she got mad and left with a rude comment.
i just couldn't turn my head five hundred times craning my neck to look at web sites and stuff as she pulled them up. never a compromise.

BUT-- it was just fine the other day-- on friday night-- after i'd been cooped up all week, or runnin errands , or sortin crap... she "wanted to spend time with dad" - so they went to a movie and hung out---- even though-- i actually wanted to go. that was real nice .
i can't say soulman didn't ask me along-- after he heard that i was not "allowed" to go... i of course declined the offer.
daddy daughter time is important , i know that.
but anyhow-- that's just the way it is i guess.
they had a good time, and that was good for them.


I'm glad I haven't had to do it too many times. Of course its a great way to clean house.

* you got that right-- too bad it'll be the cleanest it's been since we moved in... only to leave it :))
but-- we'll be moving into a clean house-- and i swear it better stay that way... just the thought of it gettin trashed like other homes we've had makes me ill.
do these people not realize that i am literally unable to do some things? many things? they don't. i have come to that conclusion. even though soulman couldn't be a bit better about taking care of me when i'm sick, or need that kind of help.... they just don't realize that i'm on disability for a reason. "they" don't pass out disability for ten years for a black eye. so WTF.
give a gal a break. that's what i say. well. that's what i think anyhow. i've really tried to stop whining about my pain. it's hard not to, especially when all i can take is aspirin -- which in turn, tears up my stomach --- ugh.
i guess that's why moving is so damn hard on me. i have no choice but to just do it. get it done. get it un-done. and go on.

lemmee give the guy some kudos here tho--- he really did help yesterday with a lot of the cleaning stuff.. he did dishes, and floors, and stuff like that-- as well as packing his dresser and closet stuff-- so it's not like he isn't doing anything. but i guess i'm just a bitch.
but when he began having pain, and losing some of his strength? he began hiring movers. for what he used to do himself; like moving furniture etc. SO, where's MY hired help? oh, i forgot-- that would be me.
(angie came to help me with the garage--- but technically--- wouldn't the garage-- be the man's job?)
her help was HUGE-- don't get me wrong. meeting her finally was a pure joy, too. i wouldn't trade any of it.
but all i'm sayin is... i'm gettin really angry ... and sore, right about now. and it really takes a lot of the fun of the new home out the whole thing. and that makes me sad.
so does a lot of other things right now. but i won't get into that stuff.


- C -
Can't wait to see your place once you get all settled in. Is it in the same school district?

* it is, but... there might be a problem with the school she goes to. it wasn't a problem in january when she asked her dad to get her into it-- a school not even all the way built yet--- but now that her friends are going to her other school-- she wants to go there too--- and she is just boilin that she may not get to. she's never satisfied. and this is something we may not be able to change. i would love to though. cuz if she goes to the same school--- she can ride the bus--- if she goes to the new school--- guess who gets to drive her???
oh yeah. lucky me.

Close to shopping?
* kind of-- not too far ..
close to grocery, and video---- but clothes etc is about three miles further.... which is maybe the entire distance of our move :)) (again)


In a subdivision or sort of off by itself?

* not a subdivision, but a neighborhood... and thank God, NO home owners association! they are horrible out here. we've had "weed tickets" for our lawn...and for parking the boat on the street here!" no more worries about that crap. we can get rid of our boat storage now--- which will make up the difference in the house payment. woo hoo.

Closer to soul-man's work or farther away?

*just a little further.. not too bad.

You must provide your many fans with this info.

* my many fans. :))
well there ya have it. and more.

Settle down...have some iced tea and relax for a bit. Things will look differently when you get some rest. Hugs. Love, Charlotte.

* i know things will be better and look different-- or vice versa -- soon. that's all that keeps me goin right now.

thanks charlotte----- HUGS back to you!

hoping you, and everyone else have happy days in your worlds today!