Tuesday, February 9, 2010

well, that didn't last long

hiya folks---

just gonna check in real quick before bed-

if i woulda got on here half an hour ago like i planned? it woulda been much different. but, well, i got sidetracked. or perhaps that might be 'blind sided' -- in a way.
everything was goin great and WHAM! just outta the blue - bullshit came from nowhere. and i was the unsuspecting target. hmmmm. was i surprised? nah. but my good mood is in the shitter now, and i just wanna go to bed.

but-- as for the rest of the clan? here's the update-

hubby made it home safe and sound about two hours ago. he was thrilled to be home and not driving. he' dropped the boat off at storage on his way home a couple miles from here. i will see it tomorrow. i am lookin forward to it. and really, i can't wait to ride it-- and fish! but y'all know it will be a while before that happens-- number 1- it has got to have the engine from our boat put onto it. and number two-- it's just gotta get warmer before i get on a lake.

next? the daughter and i had gone to the grocery store before he got home- to get him a nice steak for his dinner, and some other stuff-- as we were once again out of everything. and i was 'forced' to let her drive us there. was i nervous? oh hell yeh. i was . she did real well on the way there. traffic was light , she had just got out of school, she was in a pretty good mood, and me? well, i wasn't feelin too bad. considering-- well, that i am just me.

so-- off we go. and honestly-- i was actually sorta relaxed-- a little. even told her "i could get used to this". i mean hell. just look at her. we were talkin, smilin, doin fine. no arguing. just cruisin along.

she did really good. and i was proud of her.

BUT-- OMFG-- the ride home? totally different story. she was fightin over the radio-- totally distracted. she nearly hit two cars. all i could do was pray, breathe, and TRY NOT to yell at her. i did not want to stress her out. she on the other hand? had NO problem yellin at me. none.
wth did I DO?
nuthin. i didn't do nuthin.
to nobody.

if i need an ass kickin-- someone just get it over with-- if it would put a stop to the dumb shit. this is flat out ridiculous. i really feel like a target is on my back. or maybe my forehead. i can't help it- that's just how it feel for me.
for nearly forty years.

some know why-- no where close to all of you. but even the ones who have a mere hint -- really have a fraction of the puzzle that is me.
but hey- don't feel bad-- i haven't even figured me out yet.
am i crazy-- or am i sleep bloggin?
all i am sleep bloggin?

this is one a those nights i could simply 'go somewhere' -- know what i mean,

but as the saying goes--
i got no place to go

we do our runnin around , and get home , and started cleanin up the kitchen so she could cook dinner for her dad. it was somethin she really wanted to do for him, and you know i wasn't gonna argue with that. so i washed dishes, and she cooked. she also did a fine job on a great meal.

it was finished a little too early-- but he was famished when he got home-- we were pretty hungry too- so we all sat at the table to eat-- something we don't do very often. and it was nice. it wouldn't have been any better had we gone out to eat. in fact- we usually regret goin out-- and complain that we coulda cooked better, and spent less, etc. and that's true. but goin out to eat- or goin to the movies- seems to be our main forms of entertainment.

so anyhow-- after dinner- we watched (DVR'd american idol).

see what i mean-- sounds like the perfect day, doesn't it?
even eevee was happy to be home-- and of course we were happy to have her back too.

but-- that's about when the shit hit the fan.
kid decides to argue with me -- over shopping-- y'all know it's my favorite thing in the world anyhow--
all i'm doin is trying to avoid confrontation -- for 15 minutes -- sweet child is yellin at me about where a certain store is-- and it's not where i say it is-- of course cuz she knows everything. and dear hubby is in lala land--- she's arguing-- i'm doing my best to make her stop-- or at least to understand that i'm so sick of buyin shit online that doesn't fit and never gets returned-- that it's go to the store-- or she doesn't get it. and it's got to the one i want to and know where it is-- not the one where she wants to go to -- which is further-- and in worse traffic--and people hell. how hard is it to accept that?????

so yeh-- she's goin on and on and on-- so much so-- i could go drive of a bridge by now. and she just won't stop !

i finally tell her-- just leave me alone or i aint buyin you shit!
yes i did. no it isn't child abuse.
if anything, what she was doing to me was adult abuse. i was about to have a damn panick attack....

and hubbby didn't say nuthin-- til i finally told her to basically-- shut up or else.

so-- maybe i over reacted? but i got mad, and then went off on him-- for rather than -- defending ME-- for the last 20 minutes while she consistently argued with me about taking her where she wanted and to buy her what she wanted-- all the while making me more and more upset-- and less and less likely to buy her a damn thing.
he tells ME to stop yelling?!!!

ooooooohhhhh. that doesn't work in my world. so now it was a total fiasco of bullshit. i was instantly pissed that he jumped to her defense after i had ONE comment in my own defense-- and he jumped to defend her-- when he remained silent while she yelled at me -- demanding her way as if she were veruca salt for the last 20 minutes.

and now-- she's upstairs-- he's in bed-- and guess where i am?
damn sure aint where i wanna be. i wanna be in bed too.
but -- nooo. even tho i took headache meds, bed meds, other bs meds-- after american idol-- with the full intent of goin to bed with my hubby today, at the same time, unlike most nights. the little nuclear fallout a while ago-- has left me somewhat frazzled and UP. so, here i sit-- in the livin room-- bloggin. perhaps-- i may soon be sleep bloggin. who knows. all i know is -
it doesn't take long for a good day to go bad. at least around this place.

run in place til i get back :))

i'll put a real post up later on i gotsta go do life stuff