Monday, November 24, 2008

if it weren't for bad luck - i'd have no luck at all

oh hush-- you know it's true.

i woke up today with loads of plans of what i would do;

- get a haircut
- wash my car
- go sign my lease
- pick up some things at the store
- dishes
*and like that isn't enough--
there WAS actually
how far have i gotten? umm, well,
- i did get laundry swapped around
- i did drink a few cups of coffee
and umm, that's about it--
i realized, dammit-

and that's when it happened ,
yep-- i found myself with dr. Google-- again.
i shouldn't have-
but this time was different-
it was a message board, so it was actually the patients writing
rather than some confusing medical crap site.
but still--
it tells me that i have much more of this

to look forward to.
the indecisiveness, and confusion
that has become my brain.
(which apparently is normal for people who have
pulmonary embolisms.
i couldn't only have a clot--
noop i had to go all the way-
and have an "infarction" too-
along with DVT (deep vein thrombosis)
meaning the clot came from a vein in my leg.
each of these adds more time to the recovery-
and from what i read-
we're talkin minimum six months!

some of these people took 2-3 months off work,
and when they went back they had to quit-
they couldn't THINK-
they still got tired too fast.
THIS really sucks ass .

i thought i was just bein a whimp--
or maybe bein chicken-
afraid to have another one.
apparently not.

this is it.
this is as good as it gets for me-
at least for a while.

so much for "spring cleaning"
this week.

i could continue--
but i won't make you suffer.

happy monday peeps