Sunday, March 30, 2008

does anybody know what time it is-does anybody really care



howdy folks---

yep, here i am, once again, would you believe that as i begin to type this it's friggin 333 a.m !!! how very interesting.

not that i have anything of interest to write about. just that i noticed the time.

i woke up at 2:45 a.m. - no particular reason this time. just woke up. i did go back to bed-- thinking i could at least TRY, before calling it over; but that only lasted about five minutes.
too much goin on upstairs-- in my feeble mind. so of course i was up again in less than five minutes.
a month or two ago it was really almost normal for me to get up this time of day every day-- and i was used to it. now- not so much. guess i better get used to it, cuz it just looks like the way things are again. getting through the day is much harder than it was before though. i'm not sure why that is. maybe i got used to staying up later, and waking up later... so now i go to bed late-- and get up at 2 or so-- getting less sleep, and so, i drag my ass all day long. i don't know.
but yesterday.. i really did nothing. absolutely nothing. and it wasn't out of lack of opportunity. it was total lack of energy and motivation.

i slept on and off quite a bit as the day dragged on. in my chair-- in my bed. it must have added up to several hours-- yest i remained very tired all day long. i hate that feeling.

about mid day or so-- soulman and soulkid went to the store-- i was invited -- but did i go?
nooop. stayed right here in my still not dressed , ass-sittin -on , sloth bein, state of mind.

later on, soulman took EEVEE to the park. that dogs needs to run and play-- in space we just don't have here--- or she would expload! so he goes almost every day with her. anyhow-- he went to a park with a fishin pond. took fishin stuff, asked if i wanted to go. did i???
noooop. i remained on my ass.. in my chair. comotose.

he was gone a couple hours. i still had accomplished nada.
but i decided i'd better get to cookin somethin.. before we ended up spending more money on prepared food--- which again, we have been doing way too much of-- simply because i haven't shopped-- or cleaned the kitchen-- or some other motivational road block has interfered.
so i did. i got up and cooked dinner-- but i was a total ass the entire time. for no real reason. just cuz i didn't want to cook. it turned out ok. (pork chops and Brussels sprouts-- yep that's it-- not even a potato! can we say-- lethargic? i think it has gone beyond lazy-- i just have NO energy.

not much between dinner and bed time. cruisin, tv, chattin with the soul-fam. watchin soulman do homework with soulkid..a science thing. he is much better at keeping her on task than i am. he did really good and so did she--- and she actually finished! yippee for both of em!

by then it was pushin 930 - 10:00--- so.. i went to bed. i had been fighting to stay awake by then already for a couple hours. knowing if i went to bed at 8 like i felt like-- i'd surely be up way too early. but apparently-- it did no good to suffer. i was still up too early.

can't figure it out. gotta be the med change. seems it has been hardest to stay awake since the switch. sooo.. i am gonna take the new one at bed time tonight, rather than in the morning like usual, and see if it makes a difference. i sure hope that is the problem. i really hate spending my life in neutral.. or worse even... PARK. ugh.

somethin's gotta give here.

so anyhow...
that's about all i got for now. we'll see if anything blogworthy happens later on.

hope y'all have good days out there

31 comments:

WaterLearner said...

Yo Soul,

You having some problem with sleeping? Jeez, I seem to have problem getting enough sleep :-).

Have a Great Weekend! It's already Sunday Evening here in Singapore. Really hot and humid here these days. Feeling stickily sweaty is a quite a normal condition for us dwellings here :-)

Anonymous said...

oops... waterlearner beat me...but then they're an hour behind us... Hi waterlearner! yes it is the close of the weekend here... eck...

bonnie said...

Good morning, Soul. Boy do I know that kind of day. What surprised me was that you couldn't even get it up to fish. You really captured the essence of being in PARK. I love this post. xoxo

The Real Mother Hen said...

One day, Soul, one day I shall have my butt super glued to the chair and sit there with you :)

I bet it'll be nice :)

Mary said...

My today may very well be like your yesterday. I'm almost too tired to wiggle this morning. No reason I should be. I just want to get back on my schedule and into my groove.

It's gathering day and I do look forward to having all my kittens in my basket. Dinner will be simple. I'm just going to enjoy the moment while sitting on my big fat butt.

Diane Vogel Ferri said...

Now your blog title - that old Chicago song is stuck in my head! Hope today is better and wishes for a good night's sleep. At least you wrote a blog post - that's an important part of the day.

JLee said...

Hey, I was just going to bed about 3am! haha I'm a party animal, what can I say?
Today is gorgeous so I wanna hear about you going outside and doing something fun now, ok? ha

mosiacmind said...

WOW it sure seems like lots of us have issues with sleep! I am waking up at 3:00 a.m. and staying awake. I usually wake up around 3:00 a.m. but go back to sleep. I am hoping tonight that I might sleep more.....hope that you are having a really good day today.

Jessica said...

I hate waking up and not being able to get back to sleep. I haven't made any food for days. Stomach flu. No dishes since Wednesday so there is a plus to being sick. Well, that and the lost weight.:)
No fret, getting back to normal today.

Moohaa said...

I've had those days without meds, what does that say about me? lol I sure hope you have a good week coming up. I hope you enjoy the book!

Cheryl said...

I was awake at the same time as you. I just couldn't stay asleep, and I never nap during the day. I hope we both sleep all night long. Who'd a thought we'd have to wish for that when we got older?

Jamie said...

I posted here earlier today, where the H...did it go?

Yes, I know you think I'm losing it, but seriously, I did.

Hmmm...

Odd.

xo

Smocha said...

I believe you Jamie, cuz so did I . Mines not here either. WTH???

Well,Soul, as of now, I refuse to comment until you have something positive to say :)))
so get on it.


Love me

SOUL said...

well.. that's alright jamie and
SMOCHA--
that tends to happen sometimes. but jamie-- you di comment on the meme..maybe you just thought you did here? doesnt matter . i still love ya- :))

SOUL said...

as for you SMOCHA--

"Well,Soul, as of now, I refuse to comment until you have something positive to say :)))
so get on it. "

you earned your own little post here this morning.


as for being "negative"-- perhaps i'm blind.. i didn't find this post all that negative.

whiney , perhaps. about med and sleep issues. and it seems most could relate.
without taking it out of context--or whatever.

most of the time when i am negative-or crybaby-- i know it-- and guess what-- you are the first to tell me that.

so-- if it's too negative here for you-- i can point you to a few who live with the same blinders on that you do. i'll give you their link if you'd like??

happy monday!

SOUL said...

hey cheryl-- how'd did you fare--?
i made it from about 11-3...
not too horrible i guess.

hope you got some sleep too.

happy monday

SOUL said...

hiya kelly--
i actually got started on your book last night--- didn't get real far-- i do read slow. but so far so good. :))

hoping you have a good week too!

SOUL said...

fostah--
i do hope you are feeling better today!
it really sucks being sick like that--especially living alone. you got any pets? i don't hink i ever asked-- if you said-- well--you know me-- i forgot- senile you know.

feel better, and happy monday!

SOUL said...

hi mosaic--
how bout you-- you get any sleep last night?
hope so---i made it to 3 again.. which is much better than 2 or 130-- so i'll take it.

happy monday!

SOUL said...

jlee--
you didn't go to bed at 333 did ya ? :))

you ARE a party animal! woo hoo!! that is if you were really partyin, and not counting sheep :))

and NO-- i let another gorgeous day slip by me.

UGH--

how bout you? did you get out?

hope you have a good monday!

SOUL said...

hi diane--
dontcha love that song tho? i always have.

and yep-- i get so much to where i don't feel like writing here-- but then i feel bad if i don't. so , i guess even when i feel like i didn't accomplish anything-- if i keep up here and with y'all..it's at least somethin. right?

hope you have a good day!

SOUL said...

hi mary--
i love the kittens in a basket thing. so cute--and reminded me of a pic i have -- of jitterbugs litter , in a basket--full of oatmeal pkgs...i'll have to find it now!

hoping you found the energy to wiggle yesterday! :))

happy monday

SOUL said...

motha!!

if we ever really do get together-- trust me-- we aren't sittin on our ass! super glued or not--
but it'll still be nice

happy monday-

SOUL said...

hi bonnie--

i know -- i'll get my mojo back eventually--- a lot has happened this past month or so-- and generally march sucks for me anyhow-- so-- it'll get better soon.
it has to right-
happy monday-

SOUL said...

yankee-- you're funny-
hope you have a great day today-

SOUL said...

WL--
you have the climate i LIVE for. i know it's uncomfortable sometimes-- but really-- i was born for that weather-- too bad i will never live in the tropics. :((

that's ok tho-- tx is ok.. cept in the winter-- but even then- it's better than most places.

happy monday-

and yep-- i did go in reverse this time--

my transmission is all screwed up. :))

Summer said...

I had a similar experience except the person went on and on and told me what I needed to do to get myeslf happy and to stop complaining, blah dee blah.

Then it happened again and again.

I am of the opinion, as you are, don't read it if you don't like it. My blog is an outlet for me as I'm sure yours is for you.

As Glenda would say, "Be gone! You have no power here!"

SOUL said...

hi summer--
you always make me smile-- no matter how much or how little you have to say-- :))

i hope you have a really good monday-- for a monday--

Rebecca said...

Sometimes a girl has to spend the day in her jammies, and not fight it or feel guilty for it. I did it yesterday. I did cook, but only cuz I didn't have the cash on hand for takeout ;) OH, and the laundry and vacuuming got done. whoopie. But I missed a fairly nice day to a hangover. Oh, well.....

Portia said...

you've been through a lot. i know it sucks not being able to motivate yourself when you want to, but don't beat yourself up over it. it will pass. i hope you get some good sleep tonight:)

Smocha said...

so-- if it's too negative here for you-- i can point you to a few who live with the same blinders on that you do. i'll give you their link if you'd like??

happy monday!

Just saw this ....do tell? What blinders am I wearing? Because MY "explanation " of depression is , "like living life with the blinders "stripped off"

and , I always ,unfortunately see the truth. And FEEL everyone's pain. So , what do you mean?

I have some 'rose colored glasses ,that I don't know about? Shit! Where ARE they??? I've needed them since I was 2!!!


please send me the links of the rosie bloggers ....maybe i can learn how to "get over it"

love me