Humpday part Five

Blog much? ummm, sometimes.

ok. well, here i am. again. the plan was to put up some photos of diego garcia after i ate dinner. well, that just aint gonna happen tonight. i am too tired to dig out the pics, scan them, upload them, post them, explain them etc etc etc. it exhausts me to even think about it right now.

i will try to get to it tomorrow, just not sure when it will be. because... i have to have an abdominal ultrasound done in the morning. i might have time to do it before i go though, but i'm not sure.

anyhow, that is part one of the doctor update... i have an abdominal ultrasound tomorrow.
then next tuesday i have the upper GI.. the scope in the belly thing.

ya know... i thank God that we have insurance... i really do. but i just can't help but to bitch right now about all the money this shit still ends up costing us. hell, y'all know me..or most of you do... i feel guilty enough to go get a twenty dollar haircut. so what do i do? i wait until i go mental before i spend the money on a haircut. this medical stuff is gonna kill me before it heals me. just in the last three days... on me alone... i have shelled out over 250.00 to doctors and meds. 162.00 of that was TODAY alone. not counting the rx he gave me that i haven't dropped off yet. and tuesday... i have to give the hospital an unknown amount of money. how crazy is that? i agreed to this, and they didn't even know how much i would have to pay! but they got their share. shit. shit shit shit shit shit! BUT... i have to have it done. this could be serious. most people wait two or three months between a consult and the actual scope...and i'm getting in there in five days. and the ultrasound in ONE day?? i've never seen a doctor move so fast. and i have seen MANY doctors. but..... what am i worrying about... oh crap...i have a bleed...they're rushing me into all these tests...oh crap. NOooooo.... i'm worrying about and pissed off about money.
are my priorities screwed up? am i screwed up? am i just overtired? am i just a bitch?
i don't know what to do. i do know that i can't have my coffee in the morning... nothing to eat or drink after midnight. the appt is at 9. i know i will get an awful headache. i never eat in the morning anyhow, but it kills me to not have coffee. and the same goes for tuesday...that appt is at 9 too. UGH> PLUS... i am not supposed to take ANY asperin etc between now and Tuesday! i will be crippled by tuesday without something for pain! WTF!

so anyhow...
i'm just a bit pissed off at the moment...and very tired...and i started a lot but finished little today...so i am in bed..yes i do know how early it is, but i slept like hell last night, and am hoping to make up for it tonight...
so...i shall cruise some blogs...and then i shall ... hopefully sleep.