a little of this--and none of that ---

i am childless today--
and have been very busy aaaalll morning--
and hubby worked a few hours but is off now--
and we are gonna quit for the day---
and hit the lake...
it's been hell week here for the both of us-- and we are just done----
i will eventually have to wash my damn dishes of course-- that WERE done-- but oddly enough, appeared from nowhere, after soulkid "cleaned her room. UGH.
i do believe the time has come for HER TO WASH THE F"N DISHES.
if only i could get beyond my dirty dish phobia. OMG. i just cannot. i don't trust her dish washin skillz. i have seen them before-- greasy, food filled glasses, and plates-- eeewweeee. i can't like it !!!

so anyhow-- yep-- so far i have fixed some bank crap-- got HALF my overdraft fee back-- and they said it won't mess up my credit or bank stuff.. PHEW.. obvious mistake and fixed the next day-- so that's a relief.

still cant bring myself to call the credit card peeps... why can i not face my life??

i guess i should say "responsibilities " here-- cuz when i said "life" to soulman.. he got upset-- and said "your life isn't that bad"... well, ummm, skuuuuze the hell outta ME.
better start analyzing my choice of words... before i speak -- ya think?

so oooo--- what i was gonna say-- before i bagan the war of babble-on... was-- for it to be only noon.. i have actually accomplished quite a bit-- so i do believe i am allowed to quit for the day--- and go catch me some fishies---


OH HEY !!!

SIDE NOTE:

do yall remember me talkin about soulmans' friend gettin killed a couple weeks ago-- in the motorcycle crash???
well, i know it's short notice, and i really meant to put this up here like a week ago-- but well, you know- and i didn't... but here it is-- and i know none of y'all are rich by any means.. but there will be a memorial fishing tournament in this guys honor, and proceeds will go to his family. he left behind a son, fighting in Iraq, a daughter, soulkids age, and a five month old baby. oh, and of course a wife.

soulman and i are going to fish it .. of course-- the day of the tournament is august 23rd.. and is sponsored by Fun - N - Sun / Sporting Center / boat and tackle sales.

which is the store he was hit in front of. and also where he had several friends and would hang out and talk, etc, and buy tackle, etc.

so anyhow-- i am hoping that if anybody wants to make a donation - in any amount-- even 10-20.00 will help.

soulman has paypal.. or if you would rather-- you could send it directly to Fun-N-Sun .. who will be the people who will give the cash directly to the family.
of course soulman will too.
he knew these people.

so anyways if you want or need more info
ask any questions here
soulmange @yahoo.com

ok.. soulman is back with the boat-- and i gotta go--
i shall return.. hopefully with a big ole fish pic!
happy satahday

And the thunder rolls---

Welp—here I am… told ya I wouldn’t stay gone too long. Not that I have been missed too terribly, but there’s been a few to check on me here and there. So those are who I am writin for. Well, them and me. I do enjoy writing. I wrote way back when, even when no one read here. I just write to write, and clear my head sometimes.

In fact, those are the times my better writing seems to enter these pages. When I don’t feel pressured or censored—or protective, or judged. Ya know. I do know ya know—at least some of you do—cuz you’ve told me. It’s too bad we end up feeling that way here—because rarely do we begin our blogs that way—but often we do end them that way. Less open, less “honest”, not as in lying (less honest) just less information, “less honest”, ya know. Yep, thought so.

Well anyhow.

I have been struggling a bit with the thought of stopping the blog thing. But I won’t do that. I have too many people that I just really care about here. And just as many who return that to me. This reading and writing and yalls worlds and even finding new people to read and share with… have simply become a big part of my daily life over this past couple of years. I can’t just walk away from that.

I have walked away from too much in my life as it is. And that is just a part of me that I want to change. Actually, I think I have already changed it. as I have seen myself try to leave this blog—your blogs—even my family a time or two this passed couple years--- I just can’t do it. I have learned what is important to me through y’all… with y’all.. and I can’t change what I’ve learned. What a terrible waste of love and openness that would be. Don’t you think?

Not just for me, but any of us. I really think we are a family of sorts here… so many of us all seem to “know the same people”.. and support each other.. it seems almost strange to me, that it worked out that way. But it also seems that it happened for a reason. It seems it happened that way for reasons we may never know too. Reasons that some have age similarities… religious similarities, childhood similarities, medical similarities, etc etc etc.. or even a conglomeration of several. Some have lost children, some have lost spouses, some have been abused, or have mental illnesses, or physical ailments, that no one else would understand—if not for certain people in “our group”.

For me—I get—and surely hope—I give—to each of you what you get and give to me.. (did that come out right???)

Before I began blogging, I was a shell of who I am today—and by no means is that perfect—LOL—y’all know that. But I sure have come a long way from where I was in the beginning.

it’s been a really rough few months for me here—and y’all know that—most of you do—but I have kept a lot of it to myself—or at least very few others—like one or two. Maybe one day I’ll get brave and just spill it.

someone told me recently—without me even goin into detail—that they “kinda thought ya might be”

after my answer to how have you been lately“.. was “oh, I’m in hell.”

So—maybe it’s almost time to dump it. who knows.

I do know I need more details before I can do that. A week or so. I am not the judge and jury here. I need a professional to make the decisions, when that happens, and I know what the dealio and plan of action is—if I don’t crack up over it—maybe if I do—I’ll let ya know more about it then.

Ok—enough of that ---

About the thunder?? Wanna know where that came from?

Eevee---- woke me up—us--- in a panick at 3 a.m. for the thunderstorm. I went ahead and got up with her. I wasn’t all the way asleep anyhow. Just kinda layin there listening to the storm and her nails on the floor—click-click-click--- ugh.

Poor eevee.

I wonder why she is so scared of thunder. Even rain on the window. It’s upsetting to me. I try to get her to get in bed with us—she wants to-and tries—but her back feet slip on the rugs—or the rugs slip—whichever—and then THAT scares her—so she’s just a ball of crybaby nerves, and won’t get on the bed even tho she wants to. So I usually just get up, and she’ll calm down.

Some.

But even tho she wants to pee—she refuses to go out and face the monster that is thunder.

The dog has issues.

But she’s a good girl.

Cept when she tries to kill sushi.

And I aint even mentionin my cats.

Ugh. The cats—I think I have soulkid “almost “ convinced that those cats are worthless little shittin eatin , scratchhin machines that only destroy and disrupt the entire home. But we still have the dilemma of nowhere to send them. L(

And that puts us in a bind, and worries us. They are the devils spawn ya know. The cats are.

Anyhow

HAPPY FRIDAY to all---

And to all a good

“SOMETHIN you like”

BYEEEEEEEEEEEE

sorry folks--

i'm thinkin i need a couple days off --

it's just one -a - those -kinda weeks

i'd rather not spread the negativity-
or blab about the piling up of -
well, shit.

so - i'll just lay low for a little while.

i'll be back tho.
y'all know i never stay away long.

i'm just lacking in the blog -spirit.
maybe when i catch up with myself
i'll be more focussed .

i will tell ya one thing that happened recently-
like two nights ago-
the dogs went at it again-
this time-
sushi managed to kick eevee's ass !
it was sort of even - sushi bled like a stuck pig- and lost a bit of EAR !
but - eevee is still limping, and we can't check the wound below her arm-
lest she take our hands off.
trust me, she's tried.
this go round-- was initiated by---
none other than SPOT- the freakin cat.
ugh.
vet bill?
no vet bill?
trying to decide.
one more day of limping--
she will have to go to the dog-tor.
dammit !


so--
do you want more of this?

or THIS ???

yep--
i thought so--

see ya soon

too damn early again- what gives?

i just cannot sleep anymore. what the hell?

and would someone tell me why i am now, not only underlined, but blue, as well?

hmmm... must just be me, cuz looky here, now it's neither, now it's just natural boring type.

hmmmmmm.

ssssooooo. without further ado, i bring you -

back by popular demand-

"The cleaning fairies"

now, Ive heard it both ways-
1- you play before you pay-
2- and also, that
that you play hard to win big.

i've heard that you scrub the floor right the first time
or b- you eat the soap the next

i've learned the more good stuff you get for him
- the faster he unloads for you

i've also heard that the more praise he gets from you-
the more he does, without being asked of you
:))

and too, the more you stroke his ego-
the more he is bound to stroke yours :))


does anybody have a birthday?
here's the birthday fairy - :))


vacationing? -
need a companion..
ehem...(AC)- :))


saved the best for last
thanks gypsy :))


which finally brings us to this one---
there are certain benefits to fishing with a fairy--
especially if you watch from the rear.
:))

did someone ask for fish pix ??

Brad picked a good day to ask for fish pix -
we went out on the lake this mornin -
and i didn't do too bad this time -

that's the only two i got,
but they were good ones.

hubby got one a little smaller -
but he also got like 9 little ones.

it was fun.
but very hot.

i accomplished nuthing else on my list-
but took a long nap-

how 'bout you?

if the early bird gets the worm, what's the early me get?

i know it isn't monday,
but it really just kinda feels like it right now.

i hope yall have a great saturday though!

my plans today shall include:

visiting y'all,
paying bills,
fixing bank messes-yep 2 now.
one bank-one credit card-
one mine fault, but an accident-
and-- one NOT my fault at all-
"summer-cleaning"
and
fishin on the lake
not necessarily in that order-

how bout yours??

/////

i slept like crap again last night-
up at like 3 or so--again-
ugh
this crap is gonna kill me...
or make me crazy one.

anyhow-
have happy days--then come tell me about it!

Soulman and the bobcat- a true story

howdy folks--
yep, i'm late again. sorry.
i shoulda posted when i was up the first time.. around 5 or 6 or so-- but i did my smoke and choke-- and decided i was just damn tired still, so i went back to bed at like 8 ish, i think. just woke up a while ago. i think this med change i had recently-- or chang-es.. i should say-- have really screwed up my sleep pattern. they've helped my head-- finally-- well, somewhat :)). no , really- alot. but man, i just can't get it together sleep-wise. too much, too little, - naps - no naps- and every day is different. and it sucks. i just can't get used to it.

so anyways-- now that i got my complaining for the day out of my system.. i have decided to post a little story for y'all. with a little prompting -- ok .. a suggestion, as it was mentioned earlier today. and seein as i really have nothing else to say today-- i'll go ahead and tell y'all a story-- bout a dude named soulman. :))

Soulman and the bobcat

Once upon a time , in a land far far away, we’ll call it Hell. Ok, we’ll call it New Mexico. But in cases that this state is mentioned y’all know I prefer to use Hell. Because for me.. that’s what it is, and always has been .

Anyhow—a long long time ago, a family lived in a place called texas. Everyone had their ups and downs at the time, but overall, the little family of three were generally happy where were living.

Soulman had a decent job, soulkid was doing fairly well in school, and had many friends, and soul, the wife, was content with her life in the small town they lived in. she would write, and swim in their pool, and enjoyed running soulkid to friends and girl scouts and other places. She also enjoyed fishing with soulman quite often.

The downfalls at the time , were mainly that the income wasn’t quite matching up to the house payment and other bills, and the home they were buying was a money pit. Every time they turned around something else happened with that house. All the way from plumbing problems, to termite infestations- which caused an entire bathroom to be torn down, to fleas to repeated flooding in living room. They were fed up and exhausted from all the work and money they had to put into the house—and still see no improvement with it.

Still, soulkid was young, and happy, and settled.

But soon, with the many home repairs, exterminators for the termites, and other problems, the house payment began to fall behind. The soulfam was in a bit of a bind, and soulman began to feel responsible for any and every financial stumbling block, or bit of unhappiness that showed itself in the home. Which that in itself caused even more stress in the home.

It wasn’t long before soul, using the one computer that the entire family shared at the time , began to notice job searches on the computer. She didn’t mention anything for several weeks.. not until it began to show in soulmans’ behavior. The distraction, silence, and extended amount of time online.

Finally… as if she didn’t already put it all together in her mind…. She asked him…

“ Are you thinking about moving back to New Mexico ? “

which is where his mother and brother, nieces and nephews lived.

She knew he was homesick for them already, even before the house began to fall apart. But lately she just felt that he had been thinking and even planning on a move out there. Even though the one time he had moved his family there several years earlier, it was no less than one problem after another.

With a slight hesitation, he answered quietly,

“how did you know”?

“I just know. But why?”

soulman went into a long explanation of dreams and goals he had for bettering his family there, vs. watching everything and everyone fall apart here. He said he already had a job lined up that would pay well, and that – “we could stay with his mom til we got on our feet”

souls’ stomach churned at the reality of it all. Finally laid out in front of her. She had been with soulman for many years, and she knew there would be no changing his mind. She was ill at the time, and out of fight, so let it go, and rolled with the flow. The move was on.

Soulkid cried for days, maybe weeks. Soulman put in notice at his job, and soul began the horrible and physically over tasking job of packing a three bedroom house, by herself.

Soulsis came out to help with some home repairs , such as hanging new drywall in the torn up bathroom, that had never been rebuilt after the termite devastation. And also to help paint the walls, and rip up the ruined and stained carpeting throughout. Souls physical condition wouldn’t allow her to do that much, on top of the packing by herself, while soulman worked all day. Together, they worked twelve hours a day on this house to prepare it for leaving and selling.

Before the packing was finished , and Soulsis back home, soul was beyond physical exhaustion, and once late at night she collapsed in the now bare concrete hallway. Luckily, soulman woke up when he heard her fall and was able to help her.

Yet— after a trip to the emergency room the next day, and steroids and pain meds for the lack of energy, swelling and pain - she had to continue the packing and cleaning etc, but with more help from soulman, until it was time to leave; less than a week later.

Soul, and soulkid left a couple days ahead of soulman, as he waited for his brother to fly out from New Mexico to help him finish the final loading of the moving truck, and final clean up of the house, and they were to drive back together to their moms house .

With the limited time frame the family had to move in, they did have to leave with the home in still not perfect selling condition. And they took a big loss on it, and their credit history. Making it impossible for them to buy a home for the next four years.

The soulfam had lived with “mommason” for the first couple of months in an old camper in the back yard.. of course with the freedom of using the house, shower, kitchen, etc any time. But soul and soulkid were simply miserable under those conditions. Soulman of course was “home”, soulkid and soul, were not. This was someone elses house. With rules, mom and daughter in law competing over who cooked what, how to do this or that, and of course—mom wanted to be mom, and wife wanted to be wife. It just wasn’t working out.

Soulman did have the job he was promised , but it was nothing like he was promised verbally. Nothing at all. Yes he was home every night—usually. But very late—as he had to drive nearly state-wide for some accounts. And the salary he was promised—verbally—did not mention that he had to pay his own gas—statewide—city wide—or buy his own tools—most of them..etc. the job sucked ass and after costs—paid very little back into his pocket, after costs. Oh, but they were tax deductible. Woo hoo.

Lotta good that did us at the time. He took a several thousand dollar pay cut—to bring us to Hell.

As the weather began to change – and the rain came and came and came—and the mud out back was disastrous—we still didn’t have money for our own home. So someone, thought it would be a great idea to transform on of the storage sheds into a temporary living quarters. Hmmmm. Okaaaaay.

We all got busy. At the time it didn’t seem like a terrible idea.

We would haul in gravel, to cut down on the mud problem. Spread it over most of the yard—of course after we cleared the 5 foot tall weeds off of half an acre or more back there. And also level the land. Not to mention massive fence work and repair, due to our two dogs—and three, pygmy goats. (don’t even ask)

Again, soulman worked long hours, so was able to escape much of the hard labor—that once again sent me to the hospital…

Which for one—entailed emptying these storage sheds that had been filled with crap unseen for years. There was stuff in there that belonged to the boys when they were kids. Aside from an occasionally cloudy day—the heat out there was unbearable.

But mommason and I worked our butts off. I couldn’t believe how hard she worked, and all for us. She became ill too. It was just too much, and looking back on it, we should have never even attempted that further than the thought of it. it was all a bad idea.

Except for the fact that the end result was that we got her sheds cleaned out, many many years of unwanted crap hauled to the dump, and the large truckload of gravel laid out back.

Which in the end, left a much better looking yard than before.. but it wasn’t cheap—or painless to get it that way.

The thing about laying the gravel though? we rented a bobcat for use in the yard..

not this kind-

but this kind--

It was a little bit fun running around on the bobcat for a couple of days. For soulman and soul both. Neither had ever driven or used one before.

But—on the final day of having the rented bobcat, soulman got in a hurry to finish leveling the last bit of land and gravel. There was an old gas meter—the type that stands from pipes out of the ground.

He was working outside by himself when he hit the wrong lever in the bobcat , and instead of the “shovel – scoop” going back—it went forward, and it knocked the meter right off of the underground pipe! Gas was coming out of that pipe so fast you could see it, big plumes of white—almost like steam. And the sound it made was terrifying. If you’ve ever seen what gas explosions do .. this was very very scary.

At the time, luckily everyone else was inside the house when soulman came rushing inside. I couldn’t see him due to the way the house is designed.. but apparently mommason did see him. He stuck his head in the door.. all we heard was-

“I just busted a gas line! Everyone get out of the house!” and then he was gone again.

I was like – “oh you’re fulla crap”

Because he is always the jokester. Always doin stuff like that, but I guess he hadn’t said something so serious in his joking before.

At that time, mommason says

“no, he really did, I saw his face, he was white as a sheet!”

two of mommasons’ sisters were there visiting, along with all of us…and two cats and two dogs.

While the three of them began grabbing purses, I immediately went to find soulkid. Once I found her—luckily not far, just in the other room, I ran her outside, and put her into my car. Then I had to rush to the back yard to the camper, and begin grabbing animals. First the dogs… at the time it was chicklet and midnight.. (both now are in heaven, but not from this)—they were well behaved and I was able to get them both at once.

Then once I got them into the car with soulkid, it was back for the cats, who were not so easy to round up as the dogs. I had to run them to the car one at a time, because of spot, she will scratch your face off in a heartbeat, especially back then.

Finally I had all my “kids” safe, and was able to go talk to soulman, who while I was rounding up kids and animals, was able to shut the gas off. He had found a rag and a wrench and without causing a spark was able to turn it off.

But he was just pacing around, feeling horrible about everything. Partly guilt, partly relief that it wasn’t worse than it was.

While we were doing our part, mommason had called 911, and her sisters notified the neighbors—“umm scuze me, your house may blow up at any time!”

Would you believe no one came out of their house?? I damn sure would have. I think. Or maybe they felt safer inside? Who knows. Or maybe I would have driven somewhere? But to just sit there and quietly wait for an explosion? Kinda strange.

Anyways, it really took a long time for the gas man to get there, and not one fireman, or police man showed up at all. Something else we thought was odd. Thank God soulman was quick on his feet , even in a panic . he was an emotional mess, everything he loved and lived for was right there, and he almost blew us all up.

I can only imagine how he felt. But nobody was angry with him. Shit happens.

We were broke as hell, and of course had to buy mommason a new meter… 200.00, but were able to make payments, so it wasn’t horrible.

The whole incident did however make us realize that we were not going to continue killing ourselves, emotionally or physically with the shed and yard remodel… although we had reached the stage that little more needed to be done. Build walls, cut out a couple windows, build a bathroom, and have the shed moved… but after that—and doing the math for the completion… we decided we’d survive in the camper/ and house.

When it got cold , around October or so, we moved into the guest room inside, and soulkid into the computer room, which of course she hated at that age.. no music, no privacy, people in and out for the computer. I really felt bad for the poor girl.

I felt bad for me too—no smoking inside—meant smoking in the camper outside—and yall know I spend the first three hours of my day chainsmokin and drinkin coffee. I sat in that 30 degree camper and cried on many a day. I hated it. the more I did it, and more soulkid was deprived of being a kid—or herself—the more depressed the two of us became. And when we became a couple mental crackers—soulman realized… we weren’t “home”… we had to get our own place— so by early December we did just that.

It was an overpriced rented piece of crap, but it was ours.

And life went on… slowly and miserably, and as my health and mind dwindled and soulkid continued to despise that state as much as I do--- soulman realized what a mistake he had made by bringing us back there.

And we left. He got his old job back here in texas—surprisingly without taking a pay cut. And we were HOME again by august.

Never to return—well except to visit the mommason.

I can deal with a few days out there, but will never ever live there again. Soulman has been forewarned by both soulkid and the soul -- you go back buddy—you go alone.

I think we’re safe.

The end.

perception? deception? or temporary state of mind?

when you first look at this photo what do you see..or think of?
is she peaceful, lying on the cool grass on a warm day maybe? thinking comforting thoughts of how good she has it. good friends, happy life, happy marriage, happy children, successful fulfilled life?

or how 'bout this one?
nice old couple, maybe married and best friends for the passed forty years.
content together , even on a rickety ole boat out on the freezing water, just being together.
kids surely grown and moved away, with the grandkids even grown , and moved on too.
yet content, and maybe the old couple next door that you watch walk down your quiet street every day hand in hand like clockwork, talking non stop- after all these years.
wondering, if you and your young marriage will weather the storms that you know theirs has,
as you watch the love between them become visible with each look or touch between them.

OR-what if THIS-

is what she saw-- unrealistic, psychedelic bugs , crawling on her skin--maybe even biting-
but only she believed they were butterflies, and it made her seem peaceful?
or maybe she pretended to be peaceful while in public-- while in reality she was confused?
or worse, terrified, but afraid to say anything?


OR- what if-THIS-
happens to be the old folks life behind closed doors?
maybe they walk hand in hand down that quiet street, looking at each other the way they do,
only because any day may be the last for one of them.
perhaps he or she is terminally ill, and though they do love each other,
one could be gone at any moment.
maybe they have no children, grandchildren, or other family;
not only not nearby, but maybe not at all.
maybe they don't have enough food to eat,
or money for medicine to keep the ill one going a little longer?
maybe the time the spend on the rickety old boat on the freezing water , in the freezing rain and temperatures,
is perhaps only in hopes that their feeble ship, and bodies will go down as one.
and their suffering will end together , just as their happiness began so many years before.


how do we know when we are reading the right signals from people?
whether we know them well, or only watch from a distance?
how do we know if we are even sending the right signals to people around us---
or even to ourselves?


for me, i can overlook the in your face type stuff---
and nit pick to death the hidden message-
that may not even be there.
how do ya know which instinct to follow??
when to push for answers when you don't get any?
does letting it go at--
"i don't wanna talk about it"

suffice as
"ok, i respect that", and you leave it alone?
or do you dig for more when you know there's more going on,
but some sort of fear of "something is holding someone back from
simply being open about it??


i'm not trying to confuse anyone-- and i don't want anyone trying to guess at who--if anyone i'm talking about--
it's a general question.
i will say a lot of it does have to do with ME and MY own perception-
of just about everything , and everyone-
and i know y'all already know how messed up that is.
but really.
i am not, and never have been the great communicator -
from me- or to someone else.
maybe in writing...occasionally.
but when it comes to crunch time--
i just can't find the words that i want to.
if i do-- it's hours, days, even months later--
and hell- what good is it then?
if it's about me.. the light bulb may go of and i can make changes if needed.
but if it's about someone else-
i always feel it's just too late-
wasted epiphany-- wasted whatever.
so why bother.
i keep it to myself 9 out of ten times--
and i never know if it still may have helped.
or not.

is any of this making sense?
or did i wake up too early again??

mixture of both maybe?
all i know at this point-
i was up way too late...
BUI-first time in awhile--
no tellin where i was or what kinda fool i made of myself.
just know it was prescribed-- and i try not to get online in that condition :))
sometimes i just do.
hubby saved me from the ole laptop strangulation yet again.
i know he thinks i'm insane-- but he loves me anyways.

i think early early way early on..
i said here somewhere
to know me is to love me..
i think that's a bit true---
cuz if you don't --
you surely gotta run as fast as you can to get away--
i really am --
well, in the words of foster and my blue hue pix...
KOOKY
:))
what a word...

hey-- the week is almost over---
anyone got big weekend plans-- let's hear em!

lookin for me?

here i am !
haha suuuure
well, i am goin fishin,
but i'll never look like that-
i will be back in a couple hours,
and after i get food for the fam and the poor kitties-
i will finally cruise around,
and see what y'all have been up to this passed week.

glad y'all like the video--
of course i like it too-
pat green is my hero- :))

catcha latah peeps
i missss you!!!!

two fer tuesday (pt one below)

oh man, i thought u tube might kill me with this one. for some reason it took like two hours to upload and process this thing. ugh. i'm sittin here fallin asleep. and starvin too.
who wants to bring us dinner? :))

anyhow-- i dropped of the river cameras this morning--- i got a phone call about twenty minutes later--- not a single picture was salvageable .... she said all three were full of water inside. needless to say, i was crushed. on the bright side though----- i at least thought far enough ahead to not try to take my good real camera on the tube .. that would really be devastating. so-- as for the river pix? i have none. but i did snag a few from the internet-- just so yall could see what it was like. we didn't have the black tubes, we had the red and blue ones..they were comfier- and had bottoms in em. but boy-- when you dragged yer ass on those big ole rocks-- it hurt anyhow. i didn't hit as many the second time i went :)) but i did hit a few.

anyhow--- here ya go-- pix galore---
i had to take a few out-- and it still runs about 5 pix longer than the music-- sorry.

welp- i'm up and around- sorta

hi peeps--

looks like it's back to the ole grind for this soul gal (sounds like "ole gal" ) feels like it too. :))
it's gonna take a week vacation to recover from the week vacation :))

anyhow-- i made a mistake in my bank yesterday-- and paid the kennel from the wrong one-- of three. will i ever close the extra two? goo-lawd. i've only planned on it for a year. i know ida done it by now if i didn't have to deal with the VA before closing the two i don't want. ugh. anybody wanna be my accountant.
so anyhow-- yup-- need to get to one bank by 9-and the other as fast as i can after that to cover the mistake-- which luckily they paid--so far without an overdraft fee-- hopefully i can get there fast enough that they won't charge me one... i have never bounced a check at that bank. at any bank-- well .. not ever-- but in like ten years or so. anyhow-- gotta go pretty quick. and would you believe the check i did bounce back then -- was for a pack of cigs??? a 30 dollar pack of cigs-- ugh.

anyhow--
what else?
it was nice to wake up (and sleep in for that matter) my very own bed-- and make coffee in my very own , normal sized coffee pot, and sit in my very own soul chair-- and smoke in my very own house... and chat with jamie like i'm used to in the morning-- rather than miss her--like has happened several times this week.

my morning routine sometimes sets the tone for my entire day-- and everything was kinda off while we were away---

but all in all it was good... we stayed very busy and active--- and it was almost stress free for me.. soulkid really worked hard at being good. she had a few complaints, and got homesick early on, but all in all, the arguments were few... and the whole time was overall excellent in my book.
we all had a great time.

but we are all happy to be home. the time we spent away was plenty. next time i think will be one or two days less. it was a bit over the top money wise-- but i really needed to get outta heah for a while.

welp-- i gotta go drop these cameras off, and try to cover my ass at the bank.. i'll be back!

cross your fingers the pix aint ruined... i might cry if they are.

yippee--- we made it !!!

we're home!!! we have our doggies! they were so happy to se us-- and we were happy to see them. and ALL of us were happy to BE home. and the kitties missed us and were happy we were back too.
we've been zombies for about an hour and a half-- and now i think it's nap time for me.
i have lots and lots of pics -- my plan is to do a slideshow- with music-- to make them a little more entertaining to look at-- but A)-- not only did my disposable camera get wet the day we went tubin in the river-- but B) the second time-- the day the other two soul peeps went to the outlet mall hell--- well.. i did somehow manage to talk them into droppin me off at the river to tube while they shopped.. i think jamies' comment had somethin to do with that :)) -- thanks bud :))
anyhow-- i took the longer trip-- over three hours vs, the 45 mins to 1hr one we took together-- and i don't know what happened-- the ONLY thing that got wet-- was the three disposable cameras ! not my cigs-- not my wallet-- not my phone-- just the cameras. i'm not complainin, just wonderin , how --or why-- that could be. so, i won't know til sometime tomorrow if any of the river pics even are gonna come out. when i find out- i will know if they get to be in the slideshow-- then it will take a while to get it put together, and up here.

and that my peoples, is about as much as i can do for now-- without fallin out on the spot-- daaaamn, i'm whooped.

i shall return later though-- and ad some pics and an update -- and tomorow, hopefully have the final wrap-up. i sure hope the river pics didn't get totally destroyed, there were some good ones on those cameras.

anyhow-- better go--
catchyalll latah-- i hope-

san antonio final 5 phew !

well we aint dead yet-- but close.
i swear, it feels like we have been gone for a month, yet it has only been few days. but it sure does feel like alot longer than that.
especially right now for some reason. i haven't been awake but maybe a half hour or so, and i am havin some major problems gettin these pix in the right order-- and correcting typos-- so just bear with me-- i don't have the battery life to spend half of it correcting mistakes. y'all know i am slow and blind in the mornings.

anyhow-- yesterday was day day 4-- or 3 1/2 however ya look at it-- i think i have been counting it as each day as one. so yesterday woulda been four by my count. so these would be san antonio day four, and today will be five- -- and tomorrow we are homeward bound. woo hoo-- and we are ready. pretty much all three of us-- are very ready to Be home.

we've done just about all that we had planned to do.. and that was all finished up by yesterday. all except the pool/jacuuzzi -- because when we finally made it down there, last night there wasn't room for a beer can..much less an extra body in the pool - or the hot tub. ugh, that was quite the bummer too, i was feelin that jaccuzi on my back and neck already. whaaaa.
oh, and sea worl-- still need to finish that up-- but i really don't think any of us care too much about it --good thing the tickets were discounted.

so anyhow, that was almost dinner time--when we went to the pool.

we didn't even roll outta the room for the day, til like noon!
that's when we went to forage for lunch ,and begin our day-


BUT-- NOT before hubby had to go find a laundromat--

oooooh-- the JOY--
i was sooo happy i didn't have to join him on this little adventure !

(don't ask me why it's blue-i dunno)

after the laundry-- we went to the observation tower i had mentioned.
when we got over there, we discovered that they charged way to much to go up there,
like 12.00 a person!
and soulkid an i just didn't care enough to throw away good money after bad, so told soulman to go up alone -
since he was the only one who really wanted to go anyhow, we would wait.
of course he didn't want to, by himself, but he did,
and he enjoyed it.


(an old church- from the tower )


while he was up there, me and soulkid just kicked around-
got her some dippin dots- took photos,
looked in a couple shops, and piddled around-- as you can see

(it took me ten tries for that pic- cuz she refused to pose ! )

(again-- blue hue-- not my camera-- so i dunno why it's blue..)

(cool-blu hue-pic-in front of tower)


finally, we leave there, and walk over to the alamo---

(a shot of the alamo)

--me and my child--
LOOK - she can smile! kinda :))

--here she is again, with her dad--
she likes him better :))

--and here's me and my soulman..--

not much to brag about for the rest of the day..
dinner in the room..and a too full pool to get into.
:((




will let ya know how today goes.

and then tomorrow-- yep-- we go home. :))
after-- shopping hell.
i'm tellin ya-- i wanna get dropped off to tube the river while they shop--
make them let me do that :))
shopping that marathon mall will ruin me for days!
then everyone will hate me...

i hope you all are doin great!

does anybody know what day it is?

i think i made this trip a little too long. i don't know nuthin bout birthin no damn vacation.
soulkid is homesick already-- ya, you'd think that would be a little difficult-- being here with both parents-- but i guess there is more at home for a teenager to miss these days than her parents-- in fact-- this is when they hate their parents. guess i forgot that part in my planning.
she wants her dog-- her cats-- her room- her privacy-- and of course-- her friends. stupid me.

and soulman-- he hasn't been home cept that one night , in like a week or more already-- so of course he wants to be home. he wants to fish, wants to talk to his friends.. and wants to hear how everything went and how everyone is with what happened with his friend in the crash the other day.

as for me??? i miss my dogs.. i already have shin splints from walkin like three or four miles a day-- as compare to maybe 1-- IF that. on days i fish. (only a couple a week ) ugh. just shoot me. i cannot believe how lazy i really am. it's sad actually. the way i have just given up-- or given in-- or whatever-- to my limitations. i need to be more like some other people i know-- and put more fight into this damn fear of making the pain worse-- and look at it like -- it will get worse before better type outlook. cuz even tho i do hurt from all the walking and extra activity-- mentally-- i feel better than i have in MONTHS! i am a little on the crippled side-- kinda lookin like a hobbit or something from Lord of the Rings-- yep "Smeagol!"
LOL
but--- it's been sooo good for me. -- all of us.

but, well like i said-- i think it shoulda been a couple days less. we still haven't done or seen a lot tho---
we haven't even been over to the Alamo-- or used our second day pass to Sea world yet. and there is some kind of observation tower right across from the hotel that soulman wants to go up in. ya ride a elevator to the top-- and i guess just look at the city and take pics. i sit on the balcony and watch the elevator go up and down.. it goes quite fast btw-- faster than i thought it would.



yesterday we were sposed to do those things.. well.. except sea world-- but we were gonna do the more mild things-- and laundry , and swim in the hotel pool....
know what we did do??? we slept ... ALOT. we were all three worn OUT. of course i was the worst of all of us. i would sleep three hours, wake for one or two and be out again. hubby slept a few hours and he was fine, then soulkid took a long nap-- but me... i slept like a cat all day-- and didn't even leave the room til 8 o'clock-- to find dinner. and if that didn't mean chain smoking in the car-- vs outside on the balcony-- i may not have even left for that :))

the other two-- at lunch did walk to the river walk, for lunch at the hard rock cafe-- we started to go there on our first night here-- we opened the door--walked in-- and i could NOT handle all the noise in there. it was awful. like walkin into a heavy metal band venue. i am just too old. it made my head pound, and ever nerve in my body wind up like a friggin rubber band. no way would i survive an hour in that place. so i told them that night -- they should go back some other time without me.. i just can't do it. so they did-yesterday. and i stayed here at the room... and chilled-- in the silence-- that i love.

sooo... yep/// lazy lazy day--
we have a lot to do and catch up on today-- but it has to start with finding a laundry mat. which to my dismay-- the hotel doesn't have on site-- i was surprised at that. i have been in cheaper hotels-- and it seems if they have a pool.. they have washing machines.
anyhow-- we still have our wet river clothes in our laundry--and if it doesn't get washed today-- a lot of stuff is gonna be ruined-- not to mention we wont have sea world clothes.

soooo--- on that note-- i reckon i better wake the clan-- cuz if we don't get goin it will be 100 degrees already and no one will wanna go anywhere.
and we can't afford another wasted day-- if that happens again, we might as well just pack up and go home.

someone needs to tell these guys that i can float the river for a few hours by myself while they shop-- i am a big girl. i don't wanna shop-- or walk for three hours :((
what do they think'll happen to me.. i have done much more dangerous things in my life.

ok.. anyhow-- my delicious.. three cups of coffee is gone.. and i am out of coffee filters.
i am also smoking in the bathroom this morning.. cuz i can't see the computer screen outside.
i hope i don't get caught. i smoked in here a while yesterday-- no one noticed the smell. hope they don't today either. :((
i want more coffee dammit.
perhaps i shall wander downstairs and forage me-self a cup??? (or two)

happy satahday!

howdy peeps--- happy friday to ya---

we are still in san antonio-- today is day four-- well technically at least. it's really day three-- but tonight will be night 4. or somethin like that. i soo lose track of time. i can't keep it straight at home-- i sure can't keep it straight here. i swear we are on the run from 9 a.m til 9 p.m. we get back to the room around 9 at night each night-- if we're lucky, and by then we're ready to just crash. of course it takes an hour or two to get wound down enough to actually fall asleep. but the days have been very very exhausting. and sooo not what any of us are used to. we are what normal people would call... well, lazy i guess. :)) ... and there is just no bein lazy here. not if we wanna get our moneys worth out of this vacay thing.

so-- to recap-- our first night- we did the riverwalk and dinner-- walked about two blocks or so from the hotel over there, and quite a bit on the riverwalk, found a place to eat-- nothin to brag about. it was extremely small.. packed, loud, and SLOW. but-- the food was decent-- but also sort of expensive- for what it was.

that's about as far as the first night went-
pix a couple posts below.

day two-- was sea world- lotsa walkin, i near brok my neck on a roller coaster-- owwwwwie.. never gonna do that again. maybe with a cervical collar-- but i tell ya-- that shit was pure hell on my neck. torture i say-- but it was really lotsa fun to ride it with my girl.
after that-- we fed some seals-- little bitty fishies. not sure what they were-- sardines maybe-- i have a few pics-- which i shall put on here latah.

also saw the sea lion show-- which was good-- tried to film part of it-- and take some photos-- thru ziplock bags--to keep my camera dry-- it worked-- but didn't come out very clearly. but-- it works good enough.

after that we were toast-- came back to the room, took naps-- went back out- with plans to see the night time "rock with shamu show" which sounded to be lotsa fun.. but we were runnin late-- and have two day passes so have time to go again. none of us had the stamina to rush through sea world to get parking and a seat-- in 15 minutes-- so we skipped it to go another night before we leave-- just not that night-- possibly not even to-night. us old folks are feelin every minute of our age right about now. and that isn't very good, so this will have to work.

so then we drove back by sea world and it looked as if it was closest to shamu-- so we decided that we would go back another time in the morning, when it es cooler. check/check? check? alls good, less-roll !

sooo.. we found a place to eat-- gorged ourselves-- and came back to the room for the night. and that is what we did.

ahh but not before scopin out the pool and peacocks first. that was really cool. and diferent. and something i've never seen at a hotel before-- anywhere. and i have been to a lot of hotels during all my travels.

soooo... this brings us to yesterday---
plans were sketchy at best in the morning. i think the plan was to finish up day two at sea world. but it was scorchin hot by 8 a.m. waaaay hoTTT. so we talked about swimming at the pool, then we talked about walking around here-- riverwalk, alamo, shoppin, eatin, that kinda easy on the body stuff.... instead-- we ended up goin to some other town a ways from here-- thirty miles or so-- and tubin down the Guadalupe river. oh man that was sooo much fun. and something i haven't done since i was a kid. we used to tube in the Kern river in california when i was like 10 or so..and later in my teens. i loved it then.. and i loved it yesterday. and i would love to do it again before we leave-- but i don't know if the other two want to.

but-- after that-- we were more than half way to austin-- so we went on into austin and took soulkid to "the Drag".. the same place she wanted to go to last time we came down this way when she brought her friend last time we went to the timeshare at canyon lake. but like i said-- no friend for her this time-- that plan fell through at the last minute. bummer for her-- but better for us-- financially-- as well as having her all to ourselves :)) she is actually being good-- overall-- and i have had more soulkid hugs, and good times--than i have in the last six months combined!
so anyhow-- back to where i was-- got sidetracked-- so we went to the drag-- and let her do some school clothes shopping. the child is in desperate need of some clothes. poor thing.
i also ended up having to get a new pair of VANS-- seein as how mine were still wet from the river-- yep-- my tube flipped over right on top of me--as i tried to get in it without tippin over-- it was pretty funny. i'm so glad i can laugh at myself--otherwise-- i am sure i woulda been mortified. but i laughed like an ass instead. and of course so did hubby, soulkid, and the twenty people who watched it happen. :)) it was great. cold but great. a true kodak moment-- missed.

BUT here are the shoes--

you love em dontcha?


ummm... after the walkin the drag, shoppin and eatin..
oooh here's where and what we ate---
oh wait-- first-- here is one of the store we went in--
i met a guy--
my new boyfriend...
he will never talk back, or nag at me--
kinda hot too huh?
:))



oh and here's his new underwear--
aint they sexy?


okkkay--
HERE-
is where, and what we ate-

(where)


(what)

this was my original order-
half a philly cheese steak-and chips--


this is mine-- AFTER hubby suggested i get a WHOLE sandwich--
the half i didn't have room for.
:))



soulkids salad meal--
the only wise one of the bunch at dinnertime-- :))
for once-
if not for the insane amount of salt and sugar-
my kid would be the picture of health !


and here is soulmans small- 5 meat pizza-
the man does like his meat!




sooooo--- after we ate-- we headed back to the hotel--
really thinking we would finally be back before 9 pm for once...
well, it didn't work out that way.
1) there was a LOT of traffic-
and
2) i saw a starbucks--
which just so happened to be at the same exit as a :
GIGANTOID outlet mall in san marcos.
so of course we had to cruise through to see what they had...
that damn place is the most huge, big, ginormous, humongous-
mall, shopping center-- whatever ya call it-
that i have ever seen !
it will take an entire day to shop there--
SMOCHA YOU WOULD BE IN HEAVEN !!!
(speakin of "your" heaven--here ya go--)

here's another little slice for ya-- :))


i of course will be in HELL as you all know already !
but it would surely be a good place to get school clothes- so how can we pass it up- right?
yep-- we can't.
(i mean the outlet mall- not goodwill btw :)) -

i suggested they drop me off at the tubin place at the river while THEY go and shop-- but all i got was a few snickers--
so i took that as a no-
rude eh?
no way will i last long at that place. no friggin way.
but i spose i will have to try.
but without exaggerating-- this place has got to be-
at minimum a mile or more long-
and sort of rectangular - i guess.
sort of.
whatever-
it is friggin-
HUGE
and i will die- or want to if they make me go !
whaaaaaaaaaaa whaaaaaaaaaaaaa !!!!!!
i don't wannnnna - NOOOOOOOO !!!!

so anyhow--
i shall return , maybe tomorrow,
with todays events,
which i hope will be slow and boring-
and will allow me to cruise blogs-
and nap.
omg- i am tired and worn down.
havin a great time- but worn the hell OUT !
i'd prolly be ready to go home-
but still have lots to do and see !

anyhow--
more pix later--
the river pix, we took on disposable cameras--
i dropped mine in the water (of course) :))
we won't develop those til after we get home.
so be watchin for those.
i didn't wanna risk ruinin my good camera.
but hopefully we got some good ones.
and i know i took the most-- so hopefully by gettin it wet-
the pix didnt get ruined.
i will cry.



hope you all have happpppppy days in your worlds today-
things are goin great here !

ps--
thanks for your words and well wishes to my hubby-
he really does appreciate that-
his buddies' funeral is today-
and you know he is on his mind.

you are all such great peeps -
love you guys !