Saturday, November 15, 2008

just when we thought it was over--- here comes more medical crap - but wait- there's more :))

howdy folks----

i saw ya roll your eyes that time :))

i know, i'm gettin tired of it myself around here. all this medical crap. but in a way, it's actually gettin a little interesting this time. at least it's some new and changing stuff once in a while. not that that is the good part. but that we aren't---- haha "we", don't you feel special.. we're a "we" now.

anyhow-- i guess what i mean is like so many times before i would be ---stuck on one thing, with no answers.. struggling, searching, whining, etc... but now-- damn man... it's just one thing after another. it just kinda seems like i actually do get answers once in a while--- or at least i get thrown a bone now and again.



BUT -- when i do-- something else happens -- immediately after-- that requires more answers. that of course never come fast enough for me.


so i think it just feels like we go in circles. when in reality, i think we have come to the conclusion that i really am just melting. or whatever it is ya do when ya get old and the poor body just has had enough.

here's an example---
lets start with a few recent discoveries ---
such as :


my thyroid gland.
there's a picture for ya-
who knew, right?
i didn't.




there's where it is-
right there in the middle of your throat
lookin like a butterfly.. sorta.

but anyhow, the neuro secretary called friday, and apparently what showed up on my recent cat scan---- rather than any type of fracture-- or trauma-- that they were looking for-- was a enlarged thyroid -which we knew about from the first one- - AND on the 2nd that was done the other day-- he found a cyst. a cyst. WTF?
so, of course i spent half a day on Google trying to find out what that might mean. did i find out? well no. not anything that i could accept anyhow. :))
after hours of only confusing myself-- i just gave up. i don't know a damn thing about thyroids... cysts.. or anything like that.
cysts, nodules, tumors.... they all say different things-- but the one thing they all have in common? ummm... when they include pain, and "other" symptoms -- most likely they are cancer.

how nice.

SO:

what DO i know?
i know that my mother had a "thyroid scar and operation"
but i never cared enough to ask why ---or what was so wrong that she needed surgery--
never considered asking if perhaps it was cancer.
hmmmmm.

so , here's a thought---
any of you folks out there-- just so ya know-
thyroid probs do run in families--
so if a member of your family has had thyroid problems-- especially surgery--
perhaps you should ask why--
just in case YOU end up with probs--you can tell your doctor-
and they will have a direction to go in.
hmmmm.

cuz ya know, for me, it's a little too late to ask now.

oh and something else i found out?
labs are not always correct on thyroids--
in fact--- most labs are WRONG.

mine have always showed "good"...
now look--
all this crap i blamed on addisons--
now, i find, it could be thyroid--or a combination of the two.

no wonder i'm a lazy- depressed- non motivated, mess.
just have a look at everything the thyroid AND adrenals are responsible for in the human body-
good lawd
i'm lucky to be on my feet.
not to mention -- under two hundred pounds !

so far that's where we're at with bones and CT'S, and glands, and cysts- etc


so let's move on to what else me and doctor google found shall we?
i know y'all love it when i do that, but this time it sounds, and looks very possible in my case. and not too scary either.

it's about the god awful pain i have been having.
y'all know i am in pain alot anyways-- but since (10-20-08) the embolism and hospital etc...

the new pain has just about made me not even notice my "normal" pain.
except the migraines, there's just no forgettin about those.
BUT--
like the first several days-- maybe up to five days out of the hospital, the embolism pain continued to be severe,
bad enough to keep me awake , and and hubby too.
it was a writhing, crying, kill me pain.
but on top of that-- a couple days out--- i also got a new pain-
in my arm, neck, shoulder, under my ear, back of my head, part of my chest, and right behind there--in my back. a severe-- gut wrenching pain. that required , doctors, and meds, and tests, and all kindsa stuff-- as you know.
which was totally strange and unexplainable-- even by the docs--
like three doctors.
gp
endo
and
neuro

gp---medicated me for about 3 days---period.
endo-- referred me to ER-- for lower than low blood pressure--
(on this day -- actually, i was not having the mystery pain yet---
this was the day i couldn't walk. literally--- i fell down/got picked up-- like more than 20 times.
i tell ya-- falling in public aint fun-- i think people think you're drunk. or not-- cuz we both looked pretty much more on the helpless side-- than the embarrassed or drunk side.

anyhow-- this is why-and how-- hubby and i had brought the "mystery pain" to the day i was falling down so much. i wouldn't have even been trying to walk---- i would have stayed in bed--- but that day i had the GP appointment--and she sent me to the endo doc.
and obviously-- neither did a damn thing that was helpful.
while i was in freakin addison's crisis. :((
we treated me at home with gatoraide--
because even a endo specialist didn't know what to do in addisons crisis.
even tho we carried a injection --that we didn't know how to use-- in there with us.

anyhow---
at that time i was still in pain on my right side-- embolism pain.
the next day---
more severe pain began.. but i could walk.
we didn't know what the hell to think.
but at this point in time--as of our current time period. like in the now.
the ONLY doctor who has given a damn, or shown a bit of concern for my well being
has been my neuro doc.
he is the one who ordered every xray-- every scan-- etc.
he is the ONLY doc i have that EVER goes out of his field (if/when needed)
to explore
what may be wrong with me. ever since i've been seeing him.

(anyone in DFW area want a good neuro doc? email me for his name :))

so anyhow---
yes i know i got sidetracked. MY AREA OF EXPERTEEEESE :))
i really don't know if my brain damage is reversible...
but i will say this---
several things could be making IT worse

-fybromyalgia="brain fog"
-pulmonary embolism = lack of oxygen to brain"
-thyroid "Probs" = mental confusion.
- there's like 2 more- but i'd have to look em up, and i don't wanna :((

BUT-- to Finally get to my damn point ---
GEESH... (that is, if anyone is still reading :(P

ok-- the falling down, and gettin picked up-
remember- soulman had a broken hand,
with a hard splint-- and i was in a lot of pain-unable to walk-
leaving us quite clumsy--- in attempting to gettin me where i was goin
especially when it was up off the ground. ughh.

so-- check out this picture-- the hi-lighted area is called--

the

"Brachial Plexus"






yes i know-i never heard of it before either--
but--that is where the excruciating pain has been for the last--
what? - 3 weeks?
at least.
the one on the left shows how low it went better--
and the one on the right shows how high it went better.
and in the back, it shows the frontal pain, and there was pain behind there too--in the scapula - ish.
so-- this is why we think gettin picked up-- pulled on, stretchin my arm up over my head and in weird ways
maybe it just got "ripped" somewhere /somehow.
what i read said this can hurt for weeks to months-
also it is usually a sports injury. hmmm.
but -- it really sounds the most plausible of anything on how and where this could have come on the way it did.

so i will be bringin it up to my next doc i see.
unfortunately?
that would be my endo doc.
when i see her for the "thyroid cyst"
ugh.
i feel like i'm taking a damn transmission to cake baker when i go see her!
basically i end with the same results too.
just not as sweet :))

soooooooo....
that is my medical rant-- and update of sorts.
now let's see
what else i can bitch about--







a lot, i'm sure-- but i won't.
this entire blog has become a bitch-athon lately
and even i am gettin tired of it.
i know most of it has to do with -- well, lack of outside stimulation,
i spose. i been damn near bed-ridden for the last four out of five weeks or so.
if i walk out to the mail box it's like a trip to friggin lake fork!
ok , not so much... but it is a big deal.

or maybe it's like driving.. i've driven twice since i been down.
the first time i was pretty scared.
i was still in way to much pain, and shouldn't have drove at all,
but i had no choice that day.
but the other time, was the other day-- i still can't turn my head enough to drive very safely, but it wasn't as scary, and i felt a little free-er.
so i'm gettin there.
i also-- as you now know-- swept my floor that was very close to givin me an stroke at any-time.
AND i just now finished a load of dishes.. y'all know either somethin is real wrong-- or really not wrong when I get excited over cleaning.
i may have overdone it a little today-- but that's alright--
i'm comfortable, at least mentally-- in my home now.
and since it looks like this is where i'm gonna be for a while--

i may as well go for the trade off eh?

which i spose would be --

a little more pain,
for a little more clean?


besides---



and, luckily i have a couple friends out there who keep me pretty well entertained through the day lately. i'd be in a rubber room by now if not for them. soulman was off work for like a week or so after i got out of the hospital, and after that he got lots of time off when i had appointments--and i slept a lot etc.
but this past week that i've been awake and upright, and bored out of my skull all day-- it really helps to have my friends to keep me "entertained"-- or occupied..or whatever that would be.








and with that i will set you free.

but first-- you must know that this is the most pain in the ass post i have ever in the history of my blog, posted.
i began and stopped several times last night---
mainly due to-- falling asleep :))
i think i fell asleep on somebody's blog too-
maybe a couple somebody's. :))
oops.

and today-- my goshkness.
i have started-stopped-come back to- left- draft saved-
and one time thought i LOST this almost finished whole post cuz i accidentally closed the lid!
but it came back up on restart--- so i was happy it didn't get lost.
then here i am.. and it is now all done.
and you prolly hate me for it.
i didn't mean to leave my entire medical record here for you to read.
i planned on a few "notes"
and a quick rap up.
HA
like that is ever possible with me.

let's just hope that from now on ,
it will be.
cuz i think we're almost done.
and haven't we come a long way this year?
just wait for the annual "wrap - up"

it'll either be a miracle
or
evidence for a law suit

ya reckon?




i really will shut up now
bye folks