it's another outta my mind monday

(i'll organize these pics better later--- it explains whaddup later in the post-- you can click on the pix to make emm bigger iff'n ya want ta)

happy day to ya--
aaahll be baaaack.














howdy peeps...

hope y'alls monday isn't feelin too monday-ish.
boy, mine sure is.... here's one reason why----


yep. that really is MY laptop. :((
i woke up last night after little to no sleep. and for whatever reason, stayed up. i went to bed around 1130-ish. i think. at least that's when i took my meds and layed down. then something woke me up at about 130 a.m. i got up and checked on the girls-- surprisingly, they were sleeping. i decided to have a cigarette. with intentions of going back to bed. but that didn't happen. i ended up online-- and i couldn't even really tell you what i was doin on there. some of you maybe could, if i ended up at your place, but hell if i know.
the only way i even know i was online is cuz i burnt the hell out of my keyboard !!! (see above? )
never, ever, have i done that before. i guess i'm gonna throw some clear nail polish on the keys that burned and hope it prevents any peeling--- but with my luck it will only make it worse. i can't think of anything else to do do though.

one thing good about it? i could have stayed in bed for that cigarette and burned up the whole house with everyone in it, right?
my goodness, i gotta stop the smokin in the middle of the night. even when i don't "think" i'm tired.... like last night-- if ya think about it-- i was up and smokin and doin God knows what only a couple hours after takin 3 xanax and a couple muscle relaxers ! people have been known to drive-- and not even know it-- in that condition. i could see ME doin somethin like that. only cuz i am me. i just have luck like that. hell, knowin me , i'd prolly end up at the pond or some shit someday-- swimmin with the fishes--- only i'd be belly up. :))

someone just put me outta my misery would ya???


nah, i don't mean it that way. things are not so bad this last day or so. i guess writing about it helped me-- not that it makes it right to lay it out there for y'all-- i do know it's not "normal", in fact it's creepy and down right strange, for a person to "talk that way". but really, i am the type of person that when i "talk"-- or write something that has me in its grips-- it really does kinda lose it's power over me. and that's what happened when i wrote all that mental stuff. sometimes if i just get it outta my head, it helps. so i hope none of you got too upset over it. it is never ever my intent to upset any of you.

ok.. now i've lost my train of thought.
i'm trying to kill time as my office video uploads to utube so i can put it up here. yes, i did decide to video tape it. forgive me if you hate it. i was sleep deprived-- and like i said-- most likely a little on the over medicated side too. but it does show more detail than the pix.
but i spose i will put pix up too-- for the folks who can't handle the time or voice of the tape.


anyhow.. i really really wanna go back to bed-- but i have so much to do today i can't even stand the thought of it. i reckon i'll get back to you though on if i actually DO anything--or go to bed though. cuz the child has an appointment at 4--and another from 6 til 8. so with my entire evening booked solid? i think i really should get at least a few hours sleep before running myself down too awful much. the mono still takes a lot of my energy.
the familiy managed to get by without getting sick, so i am guessing i have passed the contagious
stages.. PHEW... so now i just really need to keep resting while i can, so i don't relapse. at least that's what the ole doctah say.

well, alrighteee then. i spose i am out of stuff to say for now.. lemmee get some pics up and check the video--- hope you likee.


and i hope you all have really good days today.

CRAP! utube finally finished my video-- BUT said it was too long to publish. just peachy.


oh well.. here's some photos.. for now. maybe later i will edit the video to make it shorter- maybe not. we shall seee. but for now-- i think i will go have a nap.