goo-lawd -- i'm bawd!!!

dammit-- i'm blind and comatose!

howdy folks----
yep-- i slept late again...
my life is passing me by-- will it ever change? it has to right? hopefully soon! one can sleep all the time for only so long right?

so anyhow-- i woke up closer to six than 4 again. there was a time that i wanted to sleep in on occasion-- but lately it is ruining my entire morning routine. and i am not likin it! not only that-- it is ruining my entire daily routine as well. it's horrible. how do people live like this? i'm afraid i'm gonna end up with damn bed sores!!! :)) i hope not.
anyhow-- i'm doin the best i can.
hopefully i'll get it together SOON.
maybe the med change is causing problems too. who knows.



but-- how bout THIS???
i just realized--- our eye appointments-- that took over a year to FINALLY schedule-- since all three of us are freakin BLIND--- well... they were scheduled for MONDAY. guess what--- monday-- is also the day-- and the same TIME that the friggin EEG is scheduled! mine is last-- and if i could drive-- i could take myself to that , and the other two could get theirs done.. BUT nooooo----- they can't do that cuz i can't drive. so now all three of us, have to reschedule our eye appointments. UGH. and i still haven't heard back for the MRI appointment time. i hate to be kept waiting.
i feel like veruca salt at times like this
Daddy I want it NOW!!!

i love that movie.
(willy wanka--the original..with the blueberry girl. :)))

welp-- i reckon that's about it--
unless ya wanna hear about one of my aunts disowning me-- (totally out of the blue--no questions asked)-- that's a story that could only come from MY family. UGH. i think i shall keep it out of blogsville...at least the details-- maybe-- well, at least for now... but really-- it's cuz i'm me. and it's sooo ridiculous... and uncalled for really. talk about blindsided. geesh, i get sick for a couple weeks.. and someone feels offended. hmmm. some peoples' kids. i tell ya.
but i will tell ya this-- it's not "auntie J"... :))

ok well
i will ttyl

happy FRIDAY!!!

still don't know nuthin

well, it's still a wait and see game. but the doc did seem to know what he was doing.. for once.

i have a MRI and a EEG scheduled for monday. no driving before then..and maybe after. it's wait and see.

it's possible that it was the flu etc, that caused the seizure-- but it's possible that it's more. but i aint goin there. yet.

the guy did at least understand that i AM in pain, and di rx some pain meds-- unlike the other docs i asked for meds. geesh. wth is it with docs these days?? i asked him once, he asked where it hurt, i told him , and he wrote a very generous script. phew.

he also explained why i am sleeping so much-- basically my brain exploded. not really, but it overloded itself or something like that. it just kinda shortcircuited or something ..i dont remember how he said it...but it should be back to normal soon. either way-- i am pretty tired again right now, and about to go to bed. we have only been home about half an hour. :((

surely this will end ?

anyhow.. that's my update.. i won't have any results prolly til tuesday?? not sure.

well.. i hope you all are havin good days---
i'll check around on ya after my nap! :))

you know you're jealous!

this will be me in about two hours. sexy huh? of course i am not looking forward to the makeover-- but i am looking forward to some answers.
i have been doing some reading this morning... would you believe that fibromyalgia has been known to cause convulsions?? so has chronic pain/nerve pain.. etc. not to mention.. migraine headaches!--- which i had-- for six days runnin! crazy.
i just don't know what to think about this. i had so many physical problems for an entire week that could have contributed to this. my whole body was out of whack. pain, flu, headache, no food, or liquids, or meds , (stayin down).. the last two days-- i had been stickin to gator aide and water--and even that wasn't stayin with me. SOOOOO. all i want is some answers. for once-- i want a doctor who knows what the hell he is talkin about-- someone with some experience with this kinda thing. no guessing. ya know. good solid answers and my drivers license.

my appointment is at ten... don't know how long it will take-- but when i get back i will let ya know what i know-- if anything. i hate not knowing stuff. especially something like THIS.

anyhow-- i hope things are perfect in your worlds today--
i'm gonna fake perfection... worry isn't cuttin it... so why not, right?

he's trying to kill me

see that dog? well, remember how sweet my soulman has been being all this past week? taking such good care of me? watching over me? well guess what? that dog up there ?---- i have been informed that soulman is going to get THAT dog! it is a belgian melenois or some kinda thing. it'll prolly EAT sushi. he says it won't.. cuz "it's trained". ugh.
it's not like i didn't already just have a seizure or anything. is he trying for a heart attack now? i don't want a new dog-- especially a full grown.. dog LIKE THAT. a puppy? maybe. but later--maybe later--- not now. and not THIS.
does anyone want to adopt me??? or soulman? :))

tell me it's a phase. tell me he is dreaming. or it's a midlife crisis thing, and he'll buy a boat instead! :))

me n julio down by the schoolyard

apparently, it's true. i am awake..and somewhat alive too. still not quite with it though. i gotta say--- it's been a while since i have felt totally clear headed... but this passed several days has been ridiculous.
and so is the song of the day! enjoy that for a while peeps :)) you know you love it.

i will say.. i actually woke up at a normal time.. for me today. like 5 a.m.
i have been sleeping way late , and then all day since friday. of course laying down, or being all crumpled up in my chair-- has not been good for my old body. or mind. i swear-- i haven't felt clear or normal in days.

i'm hoping that today will be a start back onto the right track. hubby is gonna take me out today and we will run some errands and get some fresh air, and out of this damn house. he has taken the week off since the seizure. he got a bit of the flu himself-- but he also doesn't want to leave me alone until i see the neuro doc. it is making him crazy with worry that this might happen again. i'm not real thrilled with that thought myself... but if it will be my life-- we will have to adapt. i refuse to be worried over and babysat for the rest of my life. people live very normal lives with this problem every day. it can be controlled with meds-- and actually, from reading about wellbutrin.. even though i had been on it for several years-- it was a high dose-- and with the flu-- it was basically cut off cold turkey-- so really that could be what caused it--and it may never happen again. at least that is what we are hoping. other than that i just don't know what to think.

i know y'all have your own stuff goin on, and really it's in many ways worse than what's goin on here. i guess the main thing here is the uncertainty-- and well.. ya-- the uncertainty. for now.

anybody want to buy a car? :)) i'm just kiddin. one thing-- if i can't drive my car for six months-- it will be in pretty damn good condition for its age six months from now huh? :))

sickening. that's all i can say. i was just getting to where i was getting out more--and the weather is about to change-- it's almost time for me to fish every day-- and here i might be TRAPPED... or riding a BIKE. can you see it? me on a damned modified bike with a sidecar full of fishing gear??? holy crap!
now there's a visual.

but ya know what? when things like this happen... i think it really makes a person appreciate what they have. all the complaining and whining i do about dumb stuff---- and somethin like this comes along. life changing possibly. what a bunch of crap.
but hey-- if nothin else-- it sure is a wake up call. so much could have been different.

and also... it is nice to see y'all checkin in, i miss all of you-- and i hope you know how much i appreciate your well wishes.

apparently i'm still not all with it--so just bear with me til i get it together-- i'll be my ole soul-self soon. i hope.

asleep at the wheel

hi folks, i'm still alive--- i'm just never awake. i can't believe that i sleep ALL the time.
i don't even have anything to say.
except that i'm pretty pissed off that i may lose my drivers license for six months. assuming it to be a seizure free six months.
i have a brand new damn car sittin out there -- and i can't even drive it.
i see the neuro doc on thursday , and i am only hoping that he will find something that will prove that the seizure was caused by not keeping meds down? maybe by the wellbutrin? maybe by being sick, and a combination of several things?
i am having a real hard time with this possibly being a late onset of epilepsy. that is a possibility though, and it is a scary one. my brother had epilepsy, and my mom had seizures. but i just can't claim this.
but-- i really don't know what to do at this point. i won't know anything until i see the neurologist-- and i may not even know anything after that. i don't have a history of good doctors-- i only hope this guy knows what he is doing.
all i have done since friday is sleep. i sleep late in the morning, and i sleep all damn day long. it's insane. but, i don't know what to do about it.
the shrink stopped the wellbutrin... other than that-- it's wait and see. and apparently sleep. or try not to sleep-- which doesn't seem to work very well.


anyhow-- i'm still here-- just grouchy-- and sleeping.

hope all of you are well...

i've fallen and i can't get UP

see this poor tired little dawg? intentions to keep up with blog pals.. and at minimum, stay awake! well.. this is me, this passed few days--- i cannot stay awake-- i attempt to talk to y'all on your pages-- and i seem to spew incoherent gibberish. my intentions are good tho-

still not sure what happened or why the other day-- but i sure am having a hard time gettin my head clear-- and doing anything other than sleep.

all i can say is i have a new found respect for epileptics. good lord. i could not imagine living my life like this. not knowing when or if something like that will happen again. hours in the ER.. being watched like a hawk by the family-- and no one can relax around here. poor soulman, didnt sleep for two days... he finally got some sleep last night. soulkid doesn't know what to think. i sure don't know what to think either. we don't know what caused it... or if it will happen again. but ya know-- we sure are hoping it was just a "thing".. and not a late onset of epilepsy or something. holy crap.

anyhow-- i need to see a neuro doc.. soon as i find the referral.. i will call and let ya know when i see him, and what they say.

as for now-- i still don't think i am thinking clearly-- so i think i won't be writing much around here. i just don't think my head is clear enough to be yackin too much right now.

so take care of yourselves, and if ya see me lurkin around and not talkin much-- it's probably cuz i make no sense :((

take care--and have good days today!

Soulman's Guest Post ---

hi folks---
sorry i haven't been around much ... i have slept more this passed couple days than i can remember sleeping in a long time. and y'all remember , sleeping used to be what i did best. :))

anyhow-- for anyone who is interested-- below is soulmans' version of the seizure episode from friday. i feel so bad for him. to see this happen to him , would scare the crap outta me!

anyways-- here ya go---

i shall post tomorrow. no idea about what-- seein as nothing has happened other than me sleeping 18 hours a day-- and still kickin this cold/flu thing.

we are hoping to go fishing tomorrow--- the weather is great here-- hope it is at your place too!

i miss y''all !

soulmans' guest post:

All I can say is I have seen seizures as my best friend growing up had them. However they were the calmer ones. This one caught me by total suprise and as I told Soul at the time I had no idea what was happening. We had just been talking and there was a patch of slilence of less than 2 or 3 minutes and then I heard her making a god awful noise, a sort of moaning and then she started vomiting. I flew out of my chair look at her eyes and she just started convulsing and was very stiff and her arms were drawn up and her fists clenched. I yelled at her and pulled her towards me so she would not aspirate. Basically pulled her so she was more leaning over me like you would burp a baby and she throw up all over my back. I was talking to her the whole time and she had no response other than to convulse.

She was very close to aspirating her vomit and probably did a little bit. She was so stiff and then she completly stopped breathing for what felt like minutes... more like probably 20 - 30 seconds. However that was the longest 30 seconds of my life. I literally thought she died. I slapped her face several times and slapped her back and then she drew in a long raspy breath and then she started breathing again but it was not normal breathing... It was the same breathing my dad had when he passed. It was terrifying. I had laid her back slightly so I could see her face and her eyes were rolled back and then she went wide awake eyes and looking at me like I was a complete stranger... Then she went limp and like a rag doll. She did open her eyes and I knew she was not all there and she still did not know me. Just before the ambulance arrived she would open and close her eyes like she had a bad dream or was having a dream... she would o pen and look at me so weird and then close her e yes. I kept asking her if she knew who I was and what happened and she just shook her head. Then as the Ambulance arrived they walked in and she sat upright and stared at them and she looked so scared and of course I did not want her to be scared. So as they knelt in front of her I went to the back of the couch and put my hand on her shoulder and face and they started talking to her and one of them said Soul. You had a seizure... She looked around the room in disbelief and I touched her face again and knelt by her side and then asked her again if she knew who I was and she nodded and said yes... That is when I felt better. They hooked her up to a few machines and then they started getting her ready to transport and I basically jumped in my truck and followed her to the hospital. The rest is pretty much on Souls post.

The entire ordeal to me was probably one of, if not the worst thing I have been through. I have always tried to protect Soul and Soulkid and I hope that when the time comes for one of us to die that they are not scared etc. I keep running the tape over and over again in my mind and all I can think of is how I was so scared she was dying I thought she could be having an anurysym or stroke or something. I just wanted her to know I loved her and I did not want her to hurt and she just looked to be in so much pain. My heart was hurting so bad that she had to go through it. She is such a special person and she has been through enough bad stuff in her life. I just hope it was the only one she will ever have. I pray she already knows how much I love her. However for me I plan on trying to do some things different in my life as far as my physical conditioning etc so I am in better shape so I dont go and have a heart attack or anything else on her etc. I really think thi s was brought on by her being sick as she was and not having enough liquids etc and the addisions disease how it can make your body feel rough and can compound problems. We will see what the specialists have to say about.

E-mer-gen-cy 9-1-1

morning folks-- happy satahday to ya!

wanna hear about my friday? perhaps also the reason why y'all didn't see me around too much?

well, ya know, i'll tell you anyhow-- but it wasn't a good day here-- i can tell you that much right off. i do hope things were better in your worlds!

y'all already noticed prolly that i didn't do much cruisin yesterday-- or commenting. it wasn't cuz i didn't want to-- y'all know i always want to check in on you , even if i don't say anything here, i usually try to say something on y'alls pages.
but , let's just say yesterday was not good here in Soulland. .

most of you know i've been sick this week... but yesterday-- was the worst sick day of all for me .
i would say-- it was the worst medical day in my life . and i have had a lot of medical days--and issues--as most of you know by now.

anyhow-- it started sickly-- puking etc. the day before i puked a lot too. the flu, i spose. unable to keep even liquid down. not to mention the bronchitis i've been trying to fight off as well. so, i spent the day-- trying to recover---med up-- and sleep.. cuz i hardly slept the night before at all.
nothing helped. i felt like hell all day.

soulman worked of course--soulkid went to school of course-- as their days ended, the kid called to go after school to stay the night with a friend-- i was glad later-- that i let her go.

the rest is a blur for the most part-- because i can still barely remember soulman even coming home. my memory of some things is better now than last night-- but still patchy, at best.

so-- what i do remember???
i vaguely remember that we had started to watch american idol that we recorded the night before--- (it took hours, before any of these memories came-- and they are still very fuzzy)
after that?
i was in my chair-- and didn't know where i was -- or what the hell just happened-- only that something happened... something BIG. and scary. i opened my eyes.. to a room full of EMT's -- and a very scared husband! they were calling my name over and over-- i couldn't really focus-- mentally or visual at the moment-- not until--
i heard this:

"brenda-- you had a seizure!"

that was when i think i finally opened my eyes... i saw all these people .. maybe four to six of them. and hubby. he looked white as a sheet, and on the verge of tears.
i kept hearing, you had a seizure , do you know where you are? do you know what happened?
those kinds of things. at the moment--- i knew NOTHING. i barely even know if i knew where i was.. i do know i knew hubby-- and i knew something happened.

as they got me a bit more coherent -and able to stand--- i guess-- cuz the next thing i remember -- i was in the ambulance!!! i have been in an ambulance one time in my life-- i was 15 and a whole different story---
so needles to say-- i was pretty scared.. and extremely confused. i was also puking-- mostly dry heaves--they asked me my birthday-- i didn't know it-- my age-- nope. after a couple minutes-- i saw soulmans big ole bubba mobile thru the back window of the ambulance-- i think that was when i kinda started bringing a little together-- nothing of the "event", but like who i was, my age-- but i was off at first-- by a year-- but was able to correct it.

anything before that was told to me-- by soulman.. he has his own story to tell, maybe i will have him put a post up here later with more detail. i only know he had never seen anything like it--especially from me. i had never gone into convulsions before in my life, and apparently-- this was a pretty intense one. especially for his first to have to be a part of.
he also knows that my own brother died an epileptic, in convulsions... and aside from that--- his brothers ex "wife" , died from aspirating vomit, in a drug overdose-- and a friend of his other brother-- his wife also died within 2 years of that ..-- same prob-- but no drugs involved-- it happened while she was sleeping. very very freakin weird. i could have been the third woman in or close to one family-- his family-- do have that problem, and that was his biggest fear. in fact there was one point he said i stopped breathing and went limp-- he literally thought i had died in his arms.

anyhow-- this was the first time i have ever had a seizure---convulsions anyhow-- i have suspected that i had had "small" seizures (petimals).. but was never sure.

we spent most the eve and night at ER--- they stuck needles in every possible vein in both my arms.. ekg.. head scan.... x-rays... you name it they did it-- i got the FULL workup.

i'm not looking forward to this bill. :((
but i must say-- i am very happy to have not been home alone. hubby pulled through like a champ-- and did everything right-- even though he wasn't sure what to do-- and it was very hard for him.

anyhow-- they finally let us leave-- with rx for nausea.. (and a different anti-biotic (because that was the only thing we could guess may be a part of this-- the only new med i'm on???)
but of course they would NOT rx for the excruciating headache and neck and shoulder muscle pain... ugh -- terribly pain. i wretched every possible muscle i could have in my neck etc.
i ended up vomiting, even more--2 more times after we got home-- but finally was able to keep the meds down..and sleep-- some very needed sleep. and poor hubby he was sooo freakin exhausted.. but wouldn't let me out of his sight-- and in fact-- insisted that i wake him-- no matter how early this morning. i'm happy i slept til 6 today, not the usual 4 ish.

anyhow-- i woke to a terrible headache, and my neck, shoulders, arms, are very very sore. other than that-- i feel ok. still sick with the flu-- runnin a lowgrade fever-- i guess-- close to 100. anyhow-- all that is easily remedied.

so anyhow-- if you don't see much of me today-- i'm recovering. or sleeping. i have a feeling both of us will be having a nap later.


i gotta go---- will catch ya later

holy hell....

i sure hope y'all had better nights last night than i did.
i really don't think this is bronchitis... it gradually got worse last night--- if i was the doctah i claim to be :)) -- i would say i have the friggin FLU! (maybe WITH bronchitis?)

i get bronchitis maybe once a year-- never have i puked-- or had the body aches, and headaches that this has brought with it. i couldn't sleep last night almost all.. i got "sick" like half an hour after i took my sleep meds.... which meant-- even though it crossed my mind that i "lost them"... it also crossed my mind-- that if i didn't-- taking more could mean an overdose. so, i didn't, and i did fall asleep--- later than normal... then woke up about every forty five minutes throughout the rest of the short night.

my recommendation to y'all? not that ya asked, but .. i haven't had a flu shot-- feeling immune to the flu-- since i was like ten. or maybe i had to get em in the navy-- i'm not sure. anyhow-- i have never "willingly" gone and had a flu shot .... now i wish i would have. perhaps you should?

i am in hell. and i obviously laid on my back way too much yesterday-- from about 3pm.. til maybe 430 am this morning. not good for the ole bones.

so--- ? have ya heard enough whining yet?

i'm such a crybaby. damn. but well, this is where i dump my crybaby attacks..and y'all are the "lucky" ones who get to read about them.

ok-- anyhow-- today is FRIDAY--- for those who care.
i hope y'all make it a good one...

i will be cleaning my three day old kitchen :(( it's do or die, as far as that goes.
other than that-- if i don't pass out first--- i will planting myself-- upright-- once again in my chair all day.

stay well--and have happy days in your worlds today!

life has been put on hold in soul land

ok, maybe not life-- but the weekend, has been cancelled. well, postponed really. til next month.

i feel like hell, this is kickin my butt.. hubby got home from work and decided to change our reservation. cuz i look like THIS:


and everybody knows---
when mamma aint happy-- nobody is.

i will get to y'alls comments i owe prolly in the mornin.. ...


hope you all have good nights out there

overmedicated? i doubt it, but still, i got nuthin

yep it is actually quiet here at the moment.. even the animals are quiet-- strange for a morning. usually it's animania!
anyhow-- my voice is crap-- so i'm not even talking to them today. so they are all strewn about sleeping.
and hubby and the child are gone for their days out in the real world -- as i sit here and wonder-- what-- other than picking up rx's will i do today with MY world. hmmmm. good question. i'll let ya know latah.





so anyhow--- i spose that's it.
i'm snotty, and hacky, and kinda tiahd and sickly---
hoping it will ALL pass by tomorrow---
so i can do THIS:


oh YEAAAAAAH....

happy thursday to y'all

The Big Bad B****

no, not that B***

i went to the doctor .. yep they did actually call me back..

i never had so many "things" comin at my face in one ten minute period in my life. geesh. some kinda wand thing -- looked like the eye things-- or the ear thing.. i didn't know if i should open my mouth-- close my eyes or RUN. man. then came the light up the nose, the ear thing, the throat thing, even a nose swab (to check for FLU)-- which thank God, i do not have.

i do have Bronchitis though. just as i thought. i can always tell, just from the way it feels..and my voice.

so-- after spending almost 2 hours there with the :


i dropped off an RX for cough syrup-- and carried my butt home with two inhalers , and a rx for antibiotics (to only fill in 2-3 days if i'm not better). hmmmm.

of course i got the smoking-- or should i say -- quit smoking -- lecture--
all i could do is nod in agreement , -- i know i should stop smoking..... maybe someday i will. today is just not that day.
so, i got home, and soulman was here, i gave him the rundown. he was pretty happy to hear that i shouldn't be contageous, but not too happy to hear that it's bronchitis. i always have a tough time gettin rid of it. it always hangs on for a while. hopefully i got it fast enough this time that it won't get too bad. ??




sooooo... i chatted with hubby for a little bit, but my head was pounding-- so i took some asperin and thera flu-- and came to bed.

then hubby brought me some :

yep-- soul - soup !

it was really chicken noodle (progresso) but it was good. him and soulkid ordered a pizza.

now my headache is finally gone, so i think i will take myself back out there, and watch american idol.
(it's half over now, but it's recording)

so anyhow-- have good nights out there peeps...

what is this? the week from Hell?

i mean.. happy humpday folks!

holy crap. what a damn week, and we're not even technically three days in yet.
but it's freakin 4 a.m. and i feel like i have a chainsaw in my throat. not a good feeling, in case you're wondering.

i made it to about lunchtime yesterday when i noticed my throat hurting. at first, i was hoping it was from smoking too much, cuz i really have been smoking a lot lately. a lot for even me. which is really--- A LOT. but it only kept getting worse. by 3, i was at the drugstore getting cough-drops and thera flu. YUM. afterwards, i canceled my day. planted my ass in my chair and stayed there-- except when totally necessary, until after american idol. (which we had to record, and watch late, cuz hubby got home late.. so it was ore like 930 or so, but still.... ) this shit hit me like a ton of bricks. i should have seen it comin though, because saturday night soulkid had one of her friends over here for the night, and that girl coughed and hacked soooooo bad , soulman finally had to ask if she was sick. she said she wasn't , that it might be an allergy or something. we didn't think so. but what can ya do? by then they had been out, and home, and it was probably 8 or 9 pm. we couldn't throw her out for coughin. but by-gummit--- next time i will. i think the kid had strep. at least that's what it feels like.. that deeeeep sore throat that makes me feel like a big baby..and a cough. and i feel all crappy . JUST what i need right now-- days away from going out of town. if it is strep--- it maybe 7 out of 10 times turns to bronchitis for me. yes i know-- smoking is bad for you. oh well. so is everything else.
so anyhow, not just me, but soulkid said she wasn't feeling too well either, but she hadn't lost her voice yet. hopefully she won't. and really, soulman getting sick is never a good thing ... being an instructor-- there's not much he can do at work , without a voice. terr-ific.

ok.. i'm done with my crybaby attack. for now.

ahh.. we did manage to get our drivers licenses yesterday. it went so easy. we thought we'd be there for hours by the look of all the people there--then the cop there started going through the line of like fifty people, asking what they needed, half were in the wrong building, most the others in front of us were in the wrong line--- as were we--- so it went really fast. and i had another good hair day--- woo hoo!
i didn't see my pic, but i told the guy to make sure it was a good pic, and after he took it he said it was. so i will wait and see.
another good thing about that--- we didn't have to do the eye thing! i was sooo worried about that this time. i have never sweated that before...... but last time-- about a year or so ago-- i nearly failed it-- i had to close one eye to see it! after i got mine hubby got his-- back then-- he had the same trouble-- but i had told him about the closing one eye thing.
so yesterday we were both all worried about not making it through the eye exam... luckily neither of us had to take it. PHEW! it's pretty easy when you only change an address here. well, unless you go on friggin presidents day!!!

so anyhow--- i don't think much else is happenin here. i have a dr appt this morning, and errands and housework later--- then i imagine i will med-up and go to bed when i get home. if the cough or throat get any worse through the day--i'll have to make a dr appt-- i do not want to be sick this weekend--or get anyone else sick here. the kid has missed too much school already this year, and hubby cannot afford to get sick.

ok.. i shall attempt to catch up on my comments here-- sorry that i have fallen behind yet again. bad me. don't take it personally-- i'll get it together pretty soon. i hope.

anyways-- happy humpday peeps!!!!
make it a good one....

thank God it's Tuesday!

yesterday should have been banned.... or should be for all future years to come.
but, let's just say-- it ended better than it could have--- better than i expected it to. i expected WW-3 here .. but it didn't happen.. and i am happy about that. But-- i still feel a little "heavy" about some things. it'll pass though. it always does. right.

so anyhow-- let's just leave that stuff where it belongs....

we did eat the pigs ass-- or pork butt-- or whatever people want to call it-- and maaaan it was good. we have a ton left too. perhaps i shall make a big ole pot of chili-verde with it. i love that stuff. of course i would have to leave some out for soulkid. she doesn't eat that. but she loved it last night. she had a tough time gettin over the "butt" part of it-- but once i got it through to her that it was a shoulder-- and i wansn't just saying that to make her eat it-- she did love it. hubby out-did himself on that one.
our next venture? a big ole brisket! he is the master brisket smoker man.. he makes the best smoked brisket i have ever eaten.. even from a restaraunt. (i aint correctin it-- that's how i spell it , that's how you get it-- and yes i know it woulda taken less time to correct it-- but i dont care)

sooooo--- anyways.

we have decided to go away for the weekend.. to austin. sort of-- somewhere near there. i'm not even sure where the hell the place is. some time share out there. our time share place called the other day-- talked to soulman... they have been trying to get us to "upgrade".. for like the passed two years.. prolly cuz ours is close to being paid off. they tried to sell us like a damned 20,000.00 friggin time share last time we went. OMG NONONONONO. that was quite the fiasco too--some of you may remember.? anyhow-- we paid very little for ours-- and we have barely used it--and actually sort of regretted getting it anyhow--ever since the day we signed the papers... but that is what this whole thing is about. they want to get us down to one of their better "resorts".. and try to sell us a more expensive "week". it won't happen... but we'll take the free weekend away nonetheless. Lord knows.. i need to get out of here and look at somethin different for a couple days. only thing is-- hours in the car might kill me. that part-- i am NOT lookin forward to. the last couple road trips damn near killed me.

so anyways... that's all i got for now-- i spose i shall cruise a bit-- before it gets hoppin here. :))
and i will try to catch up on my comments from yesterday later.

i hope you all have happy days in your worlds today
i will definitly try-

mUGHnday (w/ update)

ok.. it's 6:22 on a monday morning. ahhhhh.
i've already survived the morning animal hell, and alarm hell too.
and soulkid got up without me havin to go drag her out of bed... she's even getting ready-- hmmmm. last week she had a really hard time getting up-- and sacrificed precious primping time, to sleep in some.

speaking of kids--school--etc--- why is there school today? isn't it presidents' day? hell when i was a kid-- we got Lincoln , AND Washingtons' Bdays off school--- then they combined the two--cheating kids and government workers out of a whole free day off-- and now--- school? first time i can remember-- but is that my memory? or have they really done away with P- day being a "holiday"??? weird.

anyhow-- i haven't been awake long yet-- so am still a bit fuzzy in the head-- what else is new right-- i'm always fuzzy in the head. but anyhow-- i was trying to think of what my day today might hold.. without my calender... i was thinking.. not much. but then i remembered-- hubby goes to work late today-- so we will be getting our drivers licenses this morning. (with the new address) .

i remember last time i got my license here .. oh man. i do hope it won't be like that. i almost--well could have-- well, ok, wanted to-- hit the woman who was-- supposedly "helping" me. one simple question she should have asked would have saved me an entire day-- and 60 miles on my car. but noooo---- "i am me".. well, this time i KNOW to , before anything.. tell them i have a tx dl! just change the damned address! geesh.
bad part about gettin a license today? i am in a dire need of a haircut again. which i will not have time to take care of before the dl thing. just what i have always loved-- a bad dl pic. i've actually had a couple good ones-- but usually they are right after a haircut. soooo. what's that tell ya?

oh.. pigs ass update--- hubby stayed up til midnight cookin that damn thing. apparently it will be yummmmmay. i sure hope so. he said it was fallin apart-- and that is just how i like meat like that to be. can't wait.

as for last nights dinner-- we ended up at a place called RJ Gators--- by the mall. (but not after a few arguments of where to go)--- always fun-- not.
the food usually is very good there, but last night , for some reason, it just wasn't. was it my bad attitude ... or the fact that the cook that night just sucked? they apparently didn't have too great a night anyhow. as we were sittin there-- the waitress dropped a bowl of salsa right next to our table-- she called for the "bus-boy?" and he didn't come to clean it , so she did-- and you could tell she wasn't happy about that. then later-- we heard her tell a coworker-- "so-and-so-, just broke ALL our glasses!". (btw..we did hear them fall, and knew it was not a good situation back there)
poor girl. i bet she was happy NOT to be the bartender last night...
"oh here's your margarita in a giant plastic coke glass--- filled about a third of the way."
haha.
i really feel bad for the food industry people sometimes. i would never survive as a waitress. i did when i was young-- but not for long.. most my food work, was fast food.. but even then.. it sucks to work with the public...so many people are assholes.
so anyhow-- to make our dinner experience even "better"... the restaurant (i am gonna STOP correcting that word-- i spell it wrong every damn time!-- glad MY spellcheck aint broke)
anyhow-- soulkid was horrified and embarrassed to be with her parents-- at the mall.. well, by the mall. she was afraid someone she knows might see her with us. :))
i do remember those days---- but i must say--- i never did have to worry about my dad wearing carharts out to eat!!! you might be a redneck if.... :))
so anyhow-- we did the best we could with what we had-- and it went ok. the first part was a trainwreck-- but the last part was alright. :))
ahhh maaaan. the joys of parenthood.

so anyhow-- that's about it for yesterday-- and today as well.. for now.
will get back to you on how things roll today--
will catch y'all latah


////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////

yes it is definitely mUGHnday
(415 pm)

why couldn't today have been a "holiday"? or at least one i knew about? yes i know that made no sense at all. but it does to me. yes, cuz i am me. ugh. yes ugh. what a day. and it aint even over yet. in fact , it's only just beginning , in a way. holy crap. i can see i shouldn't probably be writing right now.

anyhow-- i have to go to mall hell. in a few. very few. i do not want to. and y'all know it.

we didn't get our drivers licenses today-- cuz even tho there was school today-- we drove all the way to a neighboring town for the DL office-- and guess what? it's a holiday to them! dammit.
so.. we left there-- on a good hair day no less-- bet that won't happen next time. :(( and we went to some fishin place /store i've never been to. found a bunch of good deals on clearance there. we each got a rain suit and i got a t shirt and hat all for next to nuthin-- so that much was good. then we tried to fish for a while-- but it was a little chilly and windy-- i went to the car after about ten minutes, and soulman wasn't far behind me. but this was also after some bad news.... well not "bad".. but just some "stuff".. we had to discuss. just stuff i can't put here. but it's really a pain in my ass.. and it ruined his day-- before him having to go to work. it just sucks. so anyhow-- we came home and i fixed some heartburn-- i mean lunch. yes we both got heartburn. it was frito pie and it was good-- but on an already stressed stomach-- it wasnt a good idea.

so anyhow-- soulkid is home , soulmans at work.. we're goin to the mall.. he'll be here when we get back.. i'm in a shitty mood..he prolly is too. we'll eat pigs ass for dinner... we'll all act like pigs asses... and i will see y'all later.

hope your mUGHnday is goin bettah than ours....
and Jlees
so far
(and i don't think i'm too sure about anyone elses at this point...
i'll check in later on

dirty dishes and pigs ass

so, what's goinin on peeps?

i'm late gettin around to read-- and to post--as you can see.

we had a pork butt problem earlier. the big ole chunk of pork that i got a few days ago-- with plans of slappin it on the smoker for about ten hours-- yep that one... well, hubby got it out to get it ready-- and guess what? it expired--- on the 11th. i bought it AFTER that. my EYES. i swear i checked that date. so anyhow-- soulman and i had to fight about, i mean, decide which one of us would be the unlucky one to go take it back. it wasn't me. :))
i bought it the first time.

anyhow-- my biggest plan for the day is to clean my stupid kitchen... and eat a pigs ass for dinner. :))
i KNOW it's a shoulder-- i don't know why they call it an ass.. i mean butt. do you?

ok, i have just been informed that i have pork butt guard duty. gareat. i am not a grill master-- never have been, never claimed to be, never will be. but i was just given the low-down on the egg . i am now the quartermaster of a big green egg. at least for a while. this oughtta prove interesting. he will be back before it's ready, but if i screw it up-- i will nevah live it down.
main reason being--- he burnt the chicken on it last night-- and i kinda razzed him about it. soooo. if i forget or do somethin wrong with this-- he will nag me for the rest of my life about how not only did i buy a rotten pigs ass... but ruined the second one too.

hmmmm.

(not mine--but close)

well... i guess on that note i will go clean my kitchen... fun stuff, i know... but nobody else will do it. well, unless you wanna come do it???

happy sunday y'all

I heart YOU

jess, over at foster communications gave me this here award a couple days ago. just cuz she's cool like that----

i like it-- i think it looks like a tattoo---

now i am to share the love and pass this along---

TO:

Portia - cuz she's my little sis i never had --

Oldy-- cuz she's my big sis, i've always had :))

EE cuz she is like my first ever blog sistah ! she was the first (outside of my family) to comment here-- she is still here--- and she named my blog ... from "soulmange" to "soul survivor" -- and she knows how to spread the love

Val --- cuz she's just so lovable, ya wanna kidnap her and go have coffee

simonsays--- need i say more? she's my bud . :))

Jyankee -- cuz she's my gecko sistah -- nobody else has a gecko sis :))

awwww hell--- everybody take it-- if you're on my links, you know i love ya.. and you should have it.. so i will break all the rules and give it to all of you-- if ya want it. cuz y'all deserve it, and i'm too tired to write speeches for everybody :))

sushi is two--

Valentines Day was Sushi-- AKA Sushit's-- birthday. she turned two years old. sometimes it's hard to forget she's just a babeeee.

this was right after we got her--
no bigger than that bear--
eventually---
she ATE that very bear--
that she loved.

but not before she became this:

the mutant min pin from hell!
i swear to all of you
this dog has some serious issues.
but, we love her.
she is twice the size as she should be, one of her eyes is smaller than the other,
she humps the cat--- Jitterbug-- a female.
she hallucinates-- i swear she does.. she catches flies that aren't there-
she opens and closes her mouth as if she is talking-- obviously , that is not the case.
she also farts alot-- even on company! but even they love her. and so do we.

so anyways.
she is two--and still a baby.
but big as a damn horse.
with issues.