monday---right? / with pt 1 dok-duh update

there's just no way to make pain attractive. is there?
ya. i didn't think so.
therefore, the below pic is pretty close to what i see looking back at me in the mirror today.
beyond unkempt, or sadly self neglected. i look like shit-- and not even shitty enough for a silver platter. i passed that a day ago. i'm barely scrapin by to pass for shit on a shingle. for you non military folks--- that's not very attractive. kinda resembles vomit on toast. it actually doesn't taste too bad tho-- at the galley anyhow.



ok, ok.... we'll move forward. i went all weekend with pain and crappy pain meds. my own fault cuz i sawed thru the demerol too fast. not that it helped anyhow. but at the time the codeine was making me barf, and the pain was making me cry-- and barf. so i had to do somethin.. right?
so--- now it's monday-- nurse ratched is on duty-- along with-- "dr. omg i'm terrified to write a pain script." i will be goin in at 9 to be seen for more blood work and i hope hope hope-- help with the pain. even if just some piece of mind that the pain is "normal. " i have crappy pain meds.. bad thing is if they work at all it's only for an hour or two. and that just doesn't cut it.
i don't think it is. normal pain i mean.and i am worried about it. the pain i had at ER is no longer there-- pretty much anyhow--it hurts , but nuthin like it did before--and nuthin like my damn OPPOSITE neck and shoulder is hurtin now. or since. WTH peeps? why the other side ... it kills.

yep, she's scary-- but make her help me!!!!

she has to stick me to check my blood--- maybe she'll be kind and give me something that will work for pain and not get ralphed up in the process????

ugh...
i spose y'all have heard enough about puke and pain?
i know i have.
i reckon it's gettin time to go on to the dr. hell, which means i must cleanse myself. i look like a street person. ugh boy. really. i look baaaad.
i really wish i had a normal functioning bathtub! the glass shower gets a little scary after you've fallen over twenty times.

anyhow-- i hope you all have glorious days in your worlds today--
i'll pretend to.
and i shall let you know if anything positive comes from the doctah.
i bet i'll get no more than pissed off--- as usual.

Dok-Duh Update Pt 1 -
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well, the first, and hopefully worst part of the doctor day is ovah.
have i ever told you just how much i hate doctors? maybe not. cuz it just might be impossible to verbalize. ugh. but i do hate them. i hate them ... a lot.
so, we go in. get my blood checked. it's very "off".
less than a week a go-- it read 3.33 LOL.. OMG it sure did. haha
then, saturday-- it read 2.1 --
guess what it read this a.m. a while ago? 1.1

is it good? nope. only if i wanted fat healthy blood.
which i don't. not right now. i want skinny watery anorexic blood i guess.
but that isn't what i have.
doc don't know why it's changing so fast--
not real sure how to fix it--
well sure, raise the blood thinner med--
k-- hmmm... guessing game
this, to this, to this, then see me friday.
you can go now.
ummm.. hey lady-- i am in like really bad pain.
here--have some demerol.
actually, it didn't help much what else ya got.
go have an mri and see what they say.
wait-- are you serious.. i dont want an mri-- you dumbass. i want answers-- and-or--no to less pain.
well, leave with nothing at all then .
whhhaaaaaaaa????
NO -i'll take the shot.
i am in pain.
ok have a shot-
have a ct too-
no rx tho.
i know you are in pain, but that's too bad,
i don't make addicts.
(or somethin like that)
so, ok, i took the shot in the ass,
and went and had a ct.
do i know anything?
nothin more than i knew a few hours ago.
i'm still in pain.
i have meds that make me puke.
but i'm takin em anyhow.
and all the shot in the rear did was make me tired.
i'll let ya know if anyone decides to let me know if the ct says anything.
other than that--
i'm gonna eat somethin and go to sleep-
so til next time
g'day :)))