Sunday, May 11, 2008

my kid amazes me

hiya folks --

soulkid came to me last night, with my laptop-- as i was already in bed-- insisting that i read an email that she had "spent forever" writing to me. (cuz she forgot to get me a card for mom day.)

i can't help but to share it with y'all. many of you know that she and i struggle a lot with each other --- apparently it's not only me who hopes it's a teenager thing. :))

anyhow --- here's a peek into the gentler side of my child. the one who does know how things work, how hard i try, and just how much i really do love her.
no store bought card could ever mean as much to me as

THIS:





always, always, and forever
always, always, and forever

im sitting here and thinking back to a time when i was young,
my memory is clear as day. im listening to the dishes clink
you were downstairs and youd sing songs of praise
and all the time we laughed with you
and all the time you stayed true to us

i said i thank you
ill always thank you, more than you would know,
than i could ever show. and i love you, ill always love you
theres nothing i wont do to say these words to you
that you're beautiful, forever

always, always, and forever

you were my mom, you were my dad
the only thing i ever had was you, its true
and even when the times got hard you were there to let us know that we'd get through

you showed me how to be a man
you taught me how to understand the things people do
you showed me how to love my God, you taught me that not everyone knows the truth

and i thank you, ill always thank you
more than you would know, than i could ever show
and i love you, ill always love you, theres nothing i wont do to say these words to you
that you will live forever
forever and ever
forever and ever

i said i thank you, well always thank you
more than you would know, than i could ever show
and i love you, ill always love you, there's nothing i wont do to say these words to you
that i thank you, we'll always thank you
more than you would ever know, than i could ever show
and ill love you, well always love you,
theres nothing i wont do to say these words to you
that you will live forever.


[along with the video- she sent the lyrics (below the video) --- and below (this)---- is the email she wrote .
i WAS gonna "edit" it-- cuz she does say a word or two that could be taken negatively by some people... BUT-- it is NOT meant that way-- she's a kid, and as hard as i try to break her of the habit of that word it isn't working at this point in time. if y'all know me at all.. you know we are not prejudice against any person.. race, religion , life partner, whatever-- these were her words , the best way she knew how to write them.and they mean everything to me.]

Mommmma,
i love you. and i know that i don't show it that much,
and i know that i say a lot of things i don't mean to you.
and i know that within the two months or so of being 14 i've scared you a lot
by making stupid choices, and i'm sorry. and we get in fights a lot and i've said
i've hated you a lot, but you know i don't mean it and this is basically because
i am a teenage girlllll, give me a break :). and you can be a dumb nigga some of the time,
but that's okay because so can i and know that i am a huge brat and even when i know
im wrong i keep arguing about whatever we're arguing about. i don't think you know
how much you really mean to me, and i don't think you ever will. i don't even know
how to begin to show you or tell you how much you mean to me. you've taught me
almost everything i know about life, and i feel like i can tell you almost anything.
and if we didn't talk all the time, and weren't so open with each other, i probably wouldn't
be as mature as i am now. or as mature as i think i am. hahah. and you're really understanding.
most of the time. other times you are a meanhead! :). but yeah. you are truly amazing,
and you have helped me so much in life, and your one of the few people that still have faith in me.
and i believe that you'll always be there helping me get where i want to be in life, and i can count on you.
i know that you'll do anything for me and you should know that i love you and i'd do anything/die fo you.
im just glad that you can put up with me twentyfour/seven. hahah. but yeah, i am writing this because
i dont think a stupid cardddd would say as much as i wanted to say to you, and mainly because
i forgot to buy one. hahah. :P. i love you mommmyyyyy !


God , i love that girl.
i am a happy mom today--- i hope the rest of you moms out there are too !

ahhh--- i can't be forgettin soulman here-- he took me fishin this mornin...
and looky what i got:

isn't he cute !
(he's "pee-wee" )



but look what else i got---
HIM:



who says size doesn't matter?
:))

i got him on the first cast btw-- :))

i had a third-- a small bass, decent , but small.. there were too many people watching me though, so i didn't take a pic. he was a cutie tho .

anyhow-- dinner plans tonight , other than that, i think i will work on somethin i been wantin to post for a while-- it will take some time though so check back later on tonight to see if i had any success with it eh?

28 comments:

Smocha said...

Awww that's so sweet. Don't we have the awesomest kids? :))

Happy Mothers day!!

Love me

SOUL said...

yes we do---
have yours called you yet?

happy mothers day to you too-
:))
luv me

Smocha said...

They call ME poops. :)

So far Log is the only one who's called yet. England has a hangover. they had a party last night.

I'm going to an "art show " in the park.

I shall be back with oodles of pics!

love me

SOUL said...

that's what i said :0

how bowt now?

how was the art show?

i took a nap- now i have to go buy somethin to wear to dinnah.
ugh--- go for me

to get the clothes-- not the dinnah :))

c ya latah

Diane Vogel Ferri said...

I'd say you are a very lucky mom - to have a child pour her heart out - beautiful.

Golden To Silver Val said...

This is what its all about, isn't it? Having children and raising them in a way that they will still love us through our mistakes....and we make many...but we learn from them too. Such open loving communication with your daughter makes it all worth it. I know! I have it too. Happy Mom's Day to a really special one. Love, Charlotte

SOUL said...

diane--
i'd say so too :))

SOUL said...

i reckon charlotte--
we can only do what we know how-- weird how we seem to learn right along with the young'ns eh?

anyhow-- i must be doin somethin right around here huh?

too bad i only hear about it once a year :))

welp-- i reckon i should go make myself presentable for dinnah--- i'm gonna eat like a PIG tonight.

have i mentioned--
i LOVE FOOD !!!!!!!

Jessica said...

Very sweet!
Happy Mother's Day Soul!!!

bonnie said...

Wow, you must be very very happy. That was so beautiful. I'm glad your baby sent it to you. It seems hard for our kids to express their love and appreciation for us. And what a beautiful sentiment that was. Makes me happy. (I also like your fish... your lucky day, I guess).

Andrew said...

Happy Mother's Day friend! I hope you had a good weekend and that Soulkid is a darling. Take care!!!!

WaterLearner said...

With such sweetness, your mother's day must have been splendid!!

The Real Mother Hen said...

What a cool kid is your Soul Kid!
Ah I need a piece of tissue now :)

Happy Mothers Day Soul.

And enjoy the dinner :)

Jamie said...

I LOVE it! She is quite the sweeties, even if it isn't cool to say so...and you, you are a GOOD Mom.

I love your fishies, it sounds like you had a great day. That's awesome...

I will "talk" to you in a bit..

xo

:)

JLee said...

aw, that just makes me want to cry!! How sweet!! Hope you had a great Mommy's day :)

Mary said...

A beautiful letter from a beautiful young lady. I know your heart almost burst with love and pride as you read her words. Tears were sliding down my cheeks as I read about Soulkid's love for her mother.

Have you noticed that when kids are feeling independent or irritated with you you are Mom. But when they feel closer and more dependent or when they are emotional you become Mommy? Just curious. That's the way it happened at my house.

Anonymous said...

WELP...SOUL-SIS...I can only hope that my Coffee writes me something of that sort when she gets to be Soul-Kid's age.... the "hate" thing has started already...I can't recall how many times she's told me that! LOL...I bet it just made your Mother's Day!!!!

Blur Ting said...

That is so touching, it brought tears to my eyes. You've been a really good mommy to bring all these words out of your kid.

Looking at her email really makes me think of all the things my sons are feeling.They're going through the same phase as your girl. They can be bratty and call me a stupid mom at times but deep down inside they love us.

Happy mother's day Soul.

Smocha said...

All you moms ...still struggling through the teen years....:)
Here's a glimpse of the future.

(stolen right from 2 of my kids myspace pages)


From Three's page:MY HEROES

My mom, My dad(rest his soul), step dad, Brothers Ian and wes, beth(fiance), and Travis Barker.
*********************************

And (Stolen from Ones page)

MY Heroes:

Beck was once my all time hero.. however I have finally come to terms with the fact that I won't be a rock star in this lifetime.

My Mom and kid brothers are my real heroes!

My family is the shit! We've been through hell together.
********************************

It all works out ...somehow.::)))

Love me

Smocha said...

Oh ..p.s. I forgot>>>>

What'd ya wear? where'd ya go?

details!!!!!

Moohaa said...

That's wonderful. It's lovely she took the time to write how she really feels. I think words can mean so much more then cards, flowers, fish, whatever.

Much love to you! Happy Late Mommy's day....

Don said...

Soul, I’m back after a too-long absence from reading your blog, and, no, I haven’t been on an extended fishing trip. I’m glad I got back in time to read this post of yours.

Several of your readers have commented on how your daughters email brought tears to their eyes. I know it must have done the same for you --- tears of love, joy, and happiness. It would have for me.

A belated Happy Mothers Day to you!

Portia said...

Your daughter is such a beautiful girllll. I'm glad she bared her heart for you, it can be so hard. Nice fishy too;p

Cheryl said...

You are one lucky mom to get an e-mail like that from your daughter. I'd faint if I got one. It's nice to know how she really feels. Mine would probably say the same if she just let herself be honest.

Karen said...

My two are 14 next month and yes we are entering that "trying" era. They made me a beautiful card which meant the world to me.

Even though we know deep down our kids love us, it never hurts to hear it once in a while. my daughters tell me they love me every single day.

Well done on the fishing you clever girl.

Karen said...

My two are 14 next month and yes we are entering that "trying" era. They made me a beautiful card which meant the world to me.

Even though we know deep down our kids love us, it never hurts to hear it once in a while. my daughters tell me they love me every single day.

Well done on the fishing you clever girl.

EE said...

Print that out and put it in your scrapbook. That is about the sweetest letter EVAH!!!!
You are an AWESOME MOM!!!!!!!!

SOUL said...

erin i should do that

and isn't it true that the homemade stuff always does mean the most-- i still have her preschool hand print-- and kindergarten scribbles..all kindsa things she made. it seems the store bought stuff is the stuff i can never find.

i still have almost everything she ever gave me though