i am still the great soul-crastinator. i don't think that will ever change. unfortunately.
i've been sittin here lookin at-- and adding to my ever growing "list" ... OMG. i need an assistant. i need a lot of things actually. i don't know how my life has gotten so out of control, but it has. i have lost all sense of responsibility. wth?
i know this past few weeks-- or months actually, have been one of those .. baby steps, kinda times around here. so much has been happening here in soul land. but at the same time.. it feels like nothing has been accomplished.
i think it has gotten easy for me to make excuses for myself to not do what i need to to keep things movin around here. and that's not such a good thing. so today is catchup day. i hope.
soulkid told me LAST NIGHT... at like 1030.. i get out of school early tomorrow.. gee that's great.. on a day that i would probably be gone til 3 oclock.. she'll be home at 1. yippee. just how much catchin up can i do in that amount of time. this is where prioritizing comes in... i spose. ICK. i really hate "the list".. especially when it is bigger than me.
so anyhow--- that's where i will be most of the early part of the day-- payin my late bills , in person.. and you know how i love the standing in line etc... and other crap.
then i will have to do my chores when i get done with the outside stuff-- after i'm all tired and worn out this afternoon. like that will happen. i already need a nap-- and it's 9 a.m. this cannot be good.
my sleep schedule is so screwed up-it's making me crazy... go to bed to early get up too early-- last night i went to bed late and still got up early-- even tho i set my alarm for later than normal. not that i hardly ever make it to my alarm anyways... but it happens sometimes.
midnight wouldn't wake up again today-- but she didn't sleep as late as last time she slept in. that's seems strange to talk about a dog sleeping late. but that's just her. or me. dunno.
anyhow-- it may be too soon to mention this.. so do me a favor-- and save the condolences for monday.. or even sunday night. ok? because at this point i'm ok with it. really.
but i did make the arrangements ... the dreaded appointment--- for monday at noon. that was the earliest time that all three of us could be there . soulkid has tests this week at school, so we will wait til sat or sunday to say anything about it to her. i just don't want to ruin her weekend. she sounds like a little turd a lot of times... but she isn't. and i would do anything in the world to spare her pain. i don't think i give her enough credit at times for being as mature as she is... i think she might handle this well... i just fear that she won't. and maybe i'm not at the point of acceptance that i think i am, but only in denial. i know that's very possible.. especially with a person like me. i won't know anything about anything until it's over.
i DO know that this is what is best for midnight though. and i know that the time is right. actually.. we probably waited a bit longer than we should have, but the time is now. for her.
i am hoping that "someone" will take my picture with her... but i am having a hard time bringing myself to ask for that. maybe i'll take it myself.. like one of my fish pics. should i stick my tongue in her mouth for it??? :))
i gotta get UP, and do something productive today... before i drown in a sea of laundry and animal hair--- not to mention the stackage of bills that must be paid.
hope you all have happy days today
/////////////////////////////////////////////////////
2:02 p.m
see what a kick in the ass will do?
i finished all my crap-- and was home by 1 for soulkid ... and ate lunch --- and i just may take a nap too.
hmmmm. well.
anyhow---
apparently in the above section, i chose poor wording? or whatever?
i wasn't looking for sympathy-- or advice-- i was just spewing whatever came to mind at the time. i'm not a post planner, as y'all may know by now. i start typing, and when i'm done, i post whatever is there.
soooo... anyhow.. i hope your days are good ones...
latah
19 comments:
Soul, you are a very efficient person, you have done a lot in the past few months, going through pain and moving, constantly cooking & doing dishes, active in fishing, taking care of Soulkid, paying bills. You have done a lot.
I just hope that time will stop for a while, you know, just stop so no more bills coming for a while, no more hungry mouths to feed for a while... that will be good!
I want time to stop too, so I can catch a breath and finish taking my crap before the phone rings! Argh!
I have a suggestion, Soul. I know you need the "to do" list. I have to have one, too. I agree with Mother Hen. I believe you're a lot more efficient than you think. Try keeping a list of the things you do every day for three or four days. That includes the "bring me" requests and the "where is" questions. It includes litter box duty, cooking duty, shopping hell, and everything else is mandatory day to day stuff. I think you'll find the real reason the "to do" list is overwhelming. This is where the "this is your chores" list for Soul Kid comes into play. No chores done then you have to do them and have no time to be a taxi. I had to get tough when my kids were in high school. There was hell-to-pay, but when I just ignored hell-to-pay - no response, no emotion - things became a lot easier for everyone concerned. Excuse a tough-love, bossy old lady. I just can't keep my mouth shut, can I? All said with love attached.
aaah yes time flies ... LOL esp when you dont get off yo arse...ha ha that IS funny.. I feel like that too sometimes... and at work! dont worry about it and it seems you got the necessary things done anyways... so i'll say no more..!
that's about how it goes here yankee-- it's the getting UP that i have a hard time with....
motha.. i haven't quite been the doting mother lately..or chef.. but this fly by the seat of my pants thing seems to be workin out ok... for now..
BTW--have you thought to take the phone off the hook while you crap?? :))
hey mary--
my list would then eat me for sure if i added all that to it too.
i did manage to cross off almost all of it today tho.
catch you peeps latah
Deadlines rock. I can't get anything done without them.
I think blogs, just writing all the crap out, releasing it, is damn good therapy.
The best of days to you, Soul.
You seemed to have done alot in so little time. I wanted to reorganise my wardrobe and clean up my room last weekend, I sat in front of my t-shirt cabinet, stared at the t-shirts, closed it back and went to take a nap. I didn't do shit the whole weekend!
We all can tell Soulkid is a good kid. Teenagers just can't manage their emotions too well at this stage. My kids too. Sometimes we get into shouting matches but then all is well again. They're all softies. It's good for you to keep the news about Midnight from her this week. She'll be heartbroken I'm sure, having grown up with Midnight around her all her life.
You can use the timer on your camera to take a good pix you know. Just set the timer. Place the camera before you and press the shutter. It'll go off in about 5 seconds.
I'm so, so very sorry about Midnight. I feel your pain and sorrow.
Thank you for all your kind thoughts that you leave on my blog. I really appreciate them and you!
Well look at you, getting everything done in such a short period of time! Want to come to Iowa and help me dig out of the mess I'm in? just an idea...
Have a great day!
xoxoxxo
you are wise and you know your daughter the best. Children can be surprisingly resiliant..bad example, but look at Jackson and the loss of his 48hour sea monkeys, he freaked out, and then within a day, he had gotten it out of our system. Like I said, bad example, but she may surprise you. And if she lashes out at you or Soulman, that's normal too..in the book I'm reading it says that children lash out at their parents more to show them that they're hurting too..it's all a normal developmental curve, and not until they're adults like us they realize all that stuff.
You have a LOT of emotional days going on, so don't sweat the other stuff! It'll still be there afterwards...do things to meet your spiritual emotional self, and Soulmans and your sweet soultween...
I'll be your assistant, and all I ask is for fresh coffee and lots of butter on my fish!! :)
Coffee smells good in your home,..ahhhhhhh...'oooooooh, ouch, hot, but sooo good!!"
Always,
elizabeth
Yeah, I need to get a post up..will be shortly pending the wake ups of the three..one up already..middle guy..he walks louder than I do.."SLOW YOUR ROLL SULLIVAN!!" what does he have, LEAD in his three year old pitter patters?
I'm off... :)be back in a bit!!
Hey Soul, Big hugs over the Midnight situation....nothing I can say there will make you feel one jot better. It's too sad.....
I just went through 2 bags of mail that I keep putting to one side. I knew most of it was just junk but I did find a couple of bills in there that are SLIGHTLY overdue. I feel like I just keep marking time in the same spot and not achieving a damn thing so I know exactly where you are coming from on that score.
Glad to see in your update that you achieved what you wanted to so that must make you feel better.
hey jess--
you're right-- blogs are the best therapy i have found..and free too!
how ya doin?
hope you have a good day
blur---
that sounds SO like me.. i just take one look at what needs to be done, and have to walk away in exhausted horror.. :))
eventually, i know i will accomplish something ... at least i hope so.
and thank you...
hope you have a great weekend.. did it stop raining?
hiya summah----
i worry about you ya know---
good to see you here ..
hope you have a good day..
sure jamie--- ummmm.... what are we talkin about here?
not snow i hope???
not dog shit???
not laundry???
oh gawd.. not dishes???/
i think i can handle just about anything else. k
ox :))
crustee-- i know-- and unfortunately-- i think THE TWO most emotional females on this earth are me and soulkid-- so i think next week will not be fun around here. we shall see.
butter on your fish eh? i think i can do that--- but ummm.. it's store bought fish around here remember? :)
"SLOW YOUR ROLL" i like that!
see ya later ... hope your day is goood
always good to see you travelin through gypsy
also good to know i am not the only one with a stackage of mail.. with a late bill-- or so tucked away in it :))
anyhow..
thanks..
will see ya around.. i spose it's goin on friday for you???
i wish it was here... not sure why tho. i say the dumbest crap sometimes.
latah
you don't say dumb crap, I love the words that you say..it's why you're you..and I'm grateful that I metcha and became your friend!!
Hey, did you hear that Texas has the best job rates? WOOHOO!! now who's saying stupid crap?
Good evening..it's now almost friday..9pm now.
Always,
Elizabeth
i have not heard that-- but it's prolly all construction.. this place is really growing.. too bad they don't put as much energy--and money into the hiways... ERG.
coffee's on...
that wasn't a downer post:)
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