too tired for a title

well well well. i have exactly ten minutes to eat or drink to my hearts content... but i don't want to do either. i did just finish a good sized cuppa coffee tho. i thought it would help my headache go away... but it did not. it tasted good though, and hopefully will prevent a headache in the morning, from caffeine deprivation. i am not allowed to eat or drink anything after midnight. it's 11:52. times a wastin. but anyhow. ya. i am not looking forward to the scope tomorrow. in fact i think i am a little more anxious about it than i had realized. because this passed couple days i just i don't know. i flat feel like shit. but more than the symptoms i've been having. i mean i can't sleep, i'm depressed. it doesn't matter how freakin exhausted i am during the day... my eyes will be on fire from being sooo damn tired, and i'll just lay in bed, and it's just impossible to even take a nap.

i went to run errands and pay bills etc today... OMG. i was so friggin ill i couldn't stand myself. i was at the bank, trying to take care of an error i had made, which was costing me fees... luckily they fixed it for me, because i brought my recent medical records with me... and they gave me a break because i have been sick etc. but while there... maybe thirty minutes or so... i literally could not sit upright in the chair. i laid my head on the desk, while the lady talked to someone on the phone for me! it was so embarrassing. but she was very understanding. and like i said..got everything fixed, and fees reversed for me.

then... i went to pay my cell phone bill. i had to do that in person too...because if i were to mail it, it would have been too late. and possibly shut off. and we can't have that, can we? no. so i go there. and oh Lord. what a mess. they have a new machine there, where you can pay with your credit or debit card... how cool right? no line, no waiting..instant pay. woo hoo. but... i am ME. remember? (oh crap, it's midnight...one quick swig of water!) ahhhhhh.
ok... anyways. the damn machine wouldn't accept my payment! because i am me. i tried it twice... just got paid friday... the money is in the bank... BUT ya. me. sooo.... i had to go stand in line. well... me and standing, just do not get along lately. i lasted maybe ten minutes. maybe. i was ready to pass out. i left the line.. told the guy, hey... i'm next, but i HAVE to sit down. there was a chair about ten or fifteen feet from where i shoulda been waiting. so anyhow... i know i looked bad. i was all leaned up against the wall, sittin in this chair...trying not to puke. or pass out. then this lady with two little kids...like under four... she asked if i was ok... i'm like ya, sure. i think it's lunch time. i didn't wanna go into my long ole story of med issues with a stranger. so a few minutes later.... she offered me raisins! how sweet is that? i never saw this woman before in my life. i did not accept her offer. but there just arent a lot of people like that anymore.
but anyhow... i ended up being there for what seemed an eternity. finally i get my turn in line..no ididnt lose my place, they obviously new i did not feel good. they apologized for the wait, took my money, and i got the hell out of there. i had one more bill i had to pay... next on my list was wally hell..... but next on my mind... was HELL NO! i paid the bill..it went quickly and smoothly...and i came home. i had to lay down. i struggled for three or four hours to get a nap...it didn't happen. BUT hubby and daughter went grocery shopping for me! how sa-weet is that?

i did get up and help put it away when they got back. but i did not feel like cooking...so i didn't. but around 7 or so..me and hubby...hubby and i.. went fishing. can you beleive that? feel like shit all day...then go out on the damn boat. oh well...i'm addicted, what can i say. we went for about 3 hours maybe. but i didn't fish but maybe an hour or hour and a half of it...i did for the first time ever beat hubby though. i got one..and lost one..he was half way out of the water and fell off .. ugh. so.. i "kinda" got two.. and hubby didn't get any. i do wish he would have.. but i have to admit... it was finally my turn. :))

so anyhow.. shit... i just went brain dead. can't remember what i said or what i was gonna say next. that's kinda bad. tired i guess.


anyways... i guess, i will just shut up. how's that?
i do want to say one more thing... ok two more things... rather than put it in the comment sections....

1.... THANKS to ALL of you for your thoughts and prayers, and words and support and all that. 2.... I passed the word to hubby that y'all requested an update tomorrow, if i was unable to get one out, for whatever reason. he shall take care of that...IF i can't. so do check in.