MORE testing

and it looks GOOOOD !
check z last comment box - i said howdy there :))

me thinks i overdid it on the steroids !  does that look like moon head to you?  or just dorky me?

gotta go -- i'm a busy soul lately.  someday i'll get a break :)) ya think?

could it be? am i posting? test - test ?

short test post.  been messin with this for hours .  once again.  this cut-off from my peeps, and lack of blabbin my head off in here is literally drivin me crazy.  mental-crazy-depressed.   c-r-a-z-y!!!
bleh.  maybe i'm finally gettin somewhere?  never can tell tho.  spose i'll try again tomorrow.
speak to me-- at least let me know if anyone reads or checks in anymore eh?

miss every one of ya!

g'nite!

have no idea what to do

i am postin on my desktop/ on explorer right now. ugh. usin an on screen keyboard/with my MOUSE.  very difficult for me in every physical way that you could imagine.
that, my friends, is devotion!

i miss y'all  i miss postin and visiting = it sure aint for lack of  tryin!

happy almost friday y'all

dirty pictures / photo challenge

late again but finally up

feelin dirty?

i am runnin way later than planned on everything so i am outta heah

byyyyyyyyyyyye folks!


NOTE -- we made it !  ugh.  half hour of recovery time - now it's off to shop. oh and you know - shoppin and drivin are surely my most favorite things in life.

anyhow--  i tried my hardest to post this before we left home this mornin, but as per usual, i was not able to.  so -- here ya go.  extremely late -- don't hate :))

once again - i talk too much - comment to post :))

hi y'all -- i just popped in to say howdy -- saw y'all (thanks for the sympathy's - they are so needed!)  you can see that i am post-poning this journey as long as possible.  ;))

still havin coffee, and chillin.  next i have to get my laundry ready that that has been in the dryer all night long-- i just re-ran it to get the wrinkles out.  i hate doin laundry. :((  if i don't finish it tho- i will have NUTHIN to wear.

also - i remembered - when comin in here that i NEED to find dirt photos for the photo challenge .  as usual-- it slipped my mind.  i planned to take - or find some pix last night.  did i?  hell no.  i will tho.  i gotta get my clothes finished - then i'll toss a few pix up.  then i MUST get my self ready to get on the road.

y'all be safe and have great weekends in your worlds !

and just in case i don't have to tell ya -- this has obviously become my post for today ;))

latah -

Happy Friday the 13TH Y'all

i hope y'all have better plans for the night than we do here.  do ya?  tell me about em k?
all that's happenin around the soul crib tonight is watchin the boob-tube , and scarfin down some of soulmans sushi - to go that he's bringin home.  i had a late lunch/early dinner' with soulkid earlier .
no. it was no good.  fish from a burger joint is only not natural.  it shouldn't be trusted.  it was awful.  no alternative tho.  i ate it, and questioned it later.  huge mistake.

anyhow.  soulkid has a friend here for the night - they are out , then tomorrow we are gonna go bum around in austin and school shop.  they will make sure that i am dead before we make it home on sunday.  so my plan is, that if i am able i will use facebook on my phone to keep in touch with y'all, but if for some reason that fails to work out - or if i die prematurely; i will contact the authorities -- or someone here when i return.  :))

love you guys -
hugs and kisses
souliolio

Don't fear - I'm still here. (sorta )

hello peoples, and peoplettes :))  i'm finally able to post here - but it seems a little late for that.  it was a huge surprise when i just realized i was actually posting, when i didn't think i'd be able to.  just figured i'd give it a shot.  i wondered if anyone was lookin for me?  i contacted as many folks (readers and blog friends - (or real friends who read here :))   but that still left several of y'all who i don't know how to get a hold of  me out there - who just may wonder if i kicked the bucket or somethin.

nope.  just decided to make a move.  hoping for less computer and blog issues.  i'm still havin some issues, but it seems i can find my way thru the rough spots and manage alright at the new place.


if anyone wants to swing by and see me -- or anyone you may follow from here that ya just want to keep up with-- swing on by and have a look at the place.  obviously, i'm still workin on it.  it's just a baby at this point.  someday it'll take on the old comfy dive coffee shop feel again.

anyhow -- hope to see y'all over there.  while you're here could ya clean up a little?  i'd hate to see the place get too run down.  :))

see y'all soon.

http://soulissurvivin.blogspot.com/

until then,  ore vois - happy trails --  and be happy in your worlds -- today and every day !

my new first post ! welcome folks !

ola y'all! have ya missed me? i been goin insane not bein able to blog for so long. (shaddup- i hear you already - no it wasn't a long trip) :))
and you know my memory... every day i have had tons to blab about -- and no where to put it all. finally after what has to be at least a couple, maybe a few weeks, my sis tells me on the phone - why fight all these problems? just see if you can open a NEW blog. it was like the angels sang ! it also made me feel very very stupid. just in case i had to inform you. it did. i have spent the last two hours trying to figure out how to move my other blog to this one -- obviously, i have failed at that mission. sad to say. if anyone can help me in that area , please do. my daily , if not hourly fear, is losing the contents of "soul survivor". -- if you don't already have it linked - i'll get that on here soon as i can, cuz today -- have you guessed? my computer is on hallucinogenics !!!!!!! making me wish that i could be too. hey. just for a minute. i don't do that kinda thing. and y'all know- even if i did, it would be a total waste of time and money - cuz well aside from that - cuz i never tried it -- but drugs do nothing for me. bummer huh?

anyhow-- i better go for now-- just wanted to try this out - and let y'all know i'm still breathin. and also that i feel horrible for those of you that i have neglected or lost contact with. i have done the best i could with what i got-- which is my iphone. and ya know i'm blind. so it aint much.
just know i miss you all like crazy -- and i really hope i can get my blog back in one piece . i feel soooo alone.

talk to me peeps ! even if you think i can't - i CAN see you - sometimes i just can't talk back to ya <3 X0

I'M IN !

i'm on my laptop ! i'm on friggin explorer :(( but i'm in !

hello ! at this point this is just a test. i have no idea if it's gonna post - or even work at all. mozilla still won't work. i have no idea as to why it's doin me that way . it is like that on every computer in the house. (three). ugh. it's killin me. i've all but given up. it's kind of a nice break actually. or it would be - if it wasn't so damn frustrating. no thinkin - no pressure - no checkin for posts, messeges etc. but the fact that i can't do ANY type of editing on this thing -- not even to cut and paste when i screw up words - or if my cursor moves to the wrong place and i find i've written half a paragraph where it doesn't belong -- or my photos won't go where i want them to. ugh -- not to mention the fact that i have LOST everything. EVERYTHING - aside from photos - from my laptop this passed several days - in my million and twenty five attempts to fix the damn thing. that's the worst of this entire mess. all the stuff i lost. almost three years of medical research. videos. poems.. once again- bits and pieces of my DAMN book. it's crap. three years of my thoughts, research, memories- that y'all know i can't ever get back -- are GONE! it's just sad-- for me -- and through it all... the frickin laptop still isn't workin .

good part? i found out i do still have a short time -- like less than 60 days left on my warranty !

apparantly i can still get it fixed (maybe) by dell. just a matter of sittin on hold with them for 2 hours. i spose i shall be doin that sometime today. now that is some fun shit.

ok. i spose i'm more upset about this whole thing than i realized. maybe i should just go before i end up just bitch-festing again. i really don't mean to be a crybaby so much. bleh.

i do miss y'all. and once i get things settled around here-- computer probs, kid in school, trips all finalized, soulkids car bought - and drivers license fixed and gotten. (is that a word?) - ugh -- this isn't even to mention my body paralyzing - immobilizing to even think about - disaster of house to clean... omg- i have so much to do i can't stand it. but when i get back on track in life-- i'll be back to my old self - and boy do i have some stories to tell- pictures to show- videos to share (if i ever make em :)) -- this has been the busiest summer we've had in years -- that wasn't full of tragedy - or illness, police and hospitals. we have had a blast !!! i am sure ready for it to be over tho-- cool off, settle down, and get back to my slow, sloth, quiet, clean house havin, life :))

i'll catch yall latah -- hope you all are doin well -- have happy days in your worlds -- looks like i need a day off in mine-- but i have lots to do :))

HELL-OH again :))

howdy folks !

how's things? hopefully good, in y'alls worlds.
and, unless you use face-book, you wouldn't have a clue as to what's happenin here . that's why i'm risking life and limb to 'attempt' an update here.

ok, life and limb is a bit drastic, but not far off. i'm forced to use my desktop computer this passed several days- for any and all things computer related. well cept the few things i do on my phone - but i can't hardly see a thing on there so even that's limited. and here at the desk -- OMG - after the first 15 minutes , my back is on fire with awful burning pain, in my neck and back. it drains me, hurts me, makes me tired -- add meds -- what's that give me? a ruined entire day. for what? a couple hours of 'mainly work stuff' on the computer. cuz blogger has been doin me wrong on every computer in the house, (including a IMAC- i thought they didn't GET viruses? ) - and my laptop is flat lined! even after buyin Mcafee. - and supposedly killing 111 viruses. now it won't even connect to the Internet much less anything else. this mornin i was tryin to move all important pix and files to the desktop - so soulman could remove and replace ALL programs on there - in hopes of fixing whatever the hell is wrong with it. for some reason, all that will "move" is photos', why? how do i move my files , music, and movies? anyone know? i'm usin a chip thing -- whatever it's called. (it goes in your USB port - copies from one cpu to another -- course- not in MY case. :((

so anyhow-- surely you didn't come here to listen to all that junk? what else can i bore you with?

oh -- how 'bout THIS? i didn't make this one.. i hijacked it from my sises blog (yes, another one) i haven't had the means or the time to do anything with my pix - i didn't even take very many while i was out there this trip (arkansas) last weekend. so yeh enjoy her video - as my cpu troubles have disrupted my life all week. not to mention other time consuming 'activities' -- no, sadly, no fishin. all business, no pleasure. oh-- cept for lunch with a friend of mine yesterday -- this is so cool; a story all its own. i'll tell y'all about her when my laptop is fixed. which i hope to be very soon.





(click twice/then watch it big )

ok well, that's entertainment, eh?

i had more to say - but soulman is on his way home, and it looks like we're actually gonna go out for family night-- once again with boyfriend in tow. NO not mine :)) soulkids. dinner. anyone know what's at the movies?

OH CRAP! i just remembered somethin ! guess what y'all? i checked my bank yesterday -- no not that part - that's no surprise i know.. but get THIS --- know what was there? my refund from the massage place!!! every nickel i expected ! 199.95 !!! phew. over and done.

anyways -- i'm outta heah for tonight -- i'll be back when i can be.

happy weekends out there -
hugs all around!
byeeeeeeee

Posting for Soul from Mozilla

Soulman here trying to post under Mozilla for Soul.

Ran some scan and hop to have gotten rid of her virus.

Regards all

OMG ! I'm posting on my laptop !

i don't know how- or why, but it's working!! i'm on explorer - but it's working !
i have been sitiin at my damn desktop for two or three hours - and the nerve pain in my back and neck is fixin ta make me suicidal ! just for shits and grins - i did a 'test ' on my laptop -- and voi- frickin- la -- here i am.

i am also rendered speechless ! believe it - or not. really. i just don't know what to say. aside from that? i need to get ready to go run errands and such... but i shall return. no idea what i'll say -- but i'm sure i'll think of somethin :))

i hope all of y'all are havin happy days in your worlds ! mine just got a hjelluvalot better -- oh man. just the releif of knowing that i don't have to sit at this desk and be tortured any longer makes me happy :))

i shall talk to y'all this evening... and cruise blogland as well... from the comfort of my soul-chair, on my soulass :))

ahhh... the simple pleasures in my little life.

talk to me.. update me... what's goinin folks?

see ya later

PEEK A BOO

Just jumpin in to say howdy !!! we're home from my sises place in Arkansas for this past weekend.

no time for deets right now . i am so screwed in computer land. my laptop AND my desktop have a crippling virus ! the DT may be saved.. the laptop -- well? it's F*^$#D.

oh and by the way -- as you can see , by the lovely arrangement and order of the photos above - i just did this post -- on the desktop -- on explorer.... and guess what?

EPIC FAIL !!

well, folks better jump back outta here before i blow up or my desk-top melts. eegads! whaddabunchacrap!!!

well peeps -- next weekend will be the LAST of the soul- trippins' of summer 2010 . oh man. i am so done traveling. the drive across town and back today damn near killed me. i never wanna drive again...

oh wait.. what? oh yeh. :)) where to? Lubbock Texas. long weekend at aunt wandys place - gramma j - will meet us there for a visit with her soul-grand-daughter . so yeh - a family thang.

other than that? not a lot. recovering from the trip, and goin blind at the same time.

for now? grown ups have the house to themselves for the night. this like never ever neverever happens. soulman brought SUSHI home for dinner :))

see you folks again -- when i see you again :))

talk to me ! what's goinm on in your lives people?

hellooowwww?

would i be considered insane if i through my laptop into the living room wall? because i'm gettin really close to doin that. first, my favorite and only browser, Mozilla, got some kinda 'illness' and stopped working for blogger. at first it was only for posting here -- tonight, i have realized that on certain blogs, it now, won't allow me to comment ! i am oh so fed - up ! for a week, or so - give or take - my back -up 'explorer , has been my alternative. allowing me to post here and comment elsewhere etc. keeping my head from exploding , but now? NOW, what am i to do? i am now on the browser called 'safari'. my last and only hope. if this post won't publish, or has some other type of issue? i spose this could be the end of 'soul-survivor.'

could this be God's way of forcing me to finally shut UP? or maybe -- just maybe -- a way to put my writing efforts into the ever to 'never' be written book i been talkin about for the last 20 years of my life?

it very well may be. ya know, i had a bad night last night. neck pain from hell. waking up every single hour or two. up and down. to the couch, back to bed. it was a full fledged nightmare. know what it led to? well for starters -- i missed my day today. the entire day. just didn't exist. cuz i was asleep. if i wasn't asleep asleep/ or passed out... i was simply in a percocet fog. and i do mean the entire day. soulman called at five -- "how was your day?' -- 'what day- i didn't have one" -- you lost it?' - most definitely did.'.

that made me wonder for a minute that if when folks have those extra long days -- if they're being forced to make up time for the folks who 'waste' their days sleepin. the child suffering for their fathers sin.. in some whacky way. ya know? yeh- i'm kidding. not about having the thought-- but about it bein a possibility.

so ya. wasted days and wasted nights. another song - with me in mind. hmmm.

well- if you're wonderin what i may have been doin in the half way lucid moments of the night and day? among various time wasters... i wrote a pretty long, and incoherent blog post. i didn't even know about it-- til about an hour or two ago. it's gonna take a lot of thought and pondering, before i decide if i should - or will post it or night. it's a real 'soul-post' - i'll tell ya that much. and from what i gathered -- it was intended to be - light hearted , jovial, and a fish story. trying to move away from the cry baby bullshit of the last week or so. unfortunately -- it was 90 percent of the same -- and 10 percent of the fish story -- which that part was sleep blogging typo hell. but a cool pic. :)) spose i can at least put the pic here now and tell the story later -- cuz somehow -- even after screwin a whole night and day of sleep and wake into reverse order-- i'm actually kinda tired right now. so i reckon i'll hit the sack -- and pray the pain stays away - at least enough to sleep. and have a real day tomorrow.

y'all fill in the blanks - and see if you were close when i tell the story manyana eh?

"soul wrestles alligator gar in TN !"

yee haw !!! safari worked !!!! woo hoo !

so much to blab about - so little time -- :((

all i got time for now is this -- which is actually a facebook post - or reply - or whatever - that refused to post due to is length. i haven't had that problem in some time. it's been lettin me blab my head off for weeks. oh well-- i'm runin late for my appointment - so i really gotta go for now -- i'll add more later .

somethin i didn't add in the body of this - cuz we were still workin out the deets -- is this --- i have a lunch 'date' with an old friend of mine from NAVY -A-school from waaaay back in the day --- i'm pretty excited about it. she's one of the few i never forgot about. y'all know i forget a lot. and many of those peeps were drinkin buddies. sure i miss a lot of them.. but half of em, i either remember a first name - or mainly a last name - and some, no name at all. i do remember good times. and of course the times we got in trouble. this girl always felt like a little sister. she was the youngest in our group-- and i always watched out for her. i can't wait to hear about the last 25 years of her life ! we're havin coffee this afternoon. (did i say that)?

so anyhow - here's the rest of my day-- in a - nut-house - umm 'nut-shell' :))

one more damn dr. - in less that an hour. yes i am still in my jammies, waiting as long as i possibly can. it's not even a 'test' - for once. i just don't wanna GO. it's painless, monthly - pee test - fill RX thing with the pain dr. plus we'll go over 'how i feel' fter the procedure' yesterday. all i can say is the numby is wearin off- it doesn't feel 'fat' in the back---and would ya believe -- it HURTS. well, before my magic pills. it's tolerable now. but i am highly disappointed. yet- still optomistic. there's still time for it to do it thing. it could work. look how long, and what hell i went thru with the rhizotomy... it worked for many months - and i didn;t even realize it! gimmee time - i'll try not to cry baby- happy tuesday peoples <3
ok- i am outta heah

smile - grin - or tell someone a dumb joke -- why not- right-

i'm runnin as fast as i can ---

hiya peoples , how's things in y'alls world (s) ?
i hope it's all good. hard for me to tell, seein as no one's postin today.

as for me , and my world? should i even post about it? i do wonder. i also know some of you have been waitin to see how this particular situation would pan out. so i may as well , right? it's certainly not the way i wanted to spend my morning. and i sure didn't react the way i imagined i would. well, wait. maybe i did. perhaps that is why i 'couldn't' deal with it in the first place. or maybe i should say why i 'wouldn't' deal with it. regardless, i didn't have much of a choice , when my cell phone rang - the first time, at about 11 this morning. can you guess who it was? i didn't - not when i saw the number anyhow-- it was a unfamiliar number when i saw it on my phone. i answered anyways. turned out it was some guy who worked at the 'massage place' that i have been talkin about lately. (originally) he had called to inform me that the location i have been going to was relocating. the guy was polite and professional... and obviously had no clue of what I had been dealing with concerning this business. once he mentioned the relocating tho -- i became instantly pissed off. surely you knew that was coming right? well, yeh - it happened - and i first, let it be known that not only would i NOT be relocating with the business, but i had also cancelled this account AND been charged after the cancellation. i want my money back, etc etc etc. I
hate to say it - but i blindsided the poor guy. all he was doin was notifyin clients of a move. and i ripped right into him. you gotta remember that i have had this - and more on my mind for a few weeks now, and it was set free with only the name of the company. just like a chamagne cork!
first, i started with explaining -- ok, bitchin about the financial history of my beef with them... then -- i said something that i HAD to explain. i honestly had no other choice than to let him know what the hell i was talkin about -- or i would most likely have the police knocking at my door at some really near future moment. i told him that if i didn't get my money back "bad things will happen". OOPSY. he went totally silent. i bet fifteen seconds passed -- finally i said -- wait. not like that. ugh. so i went from there to explain that what i meant was that people would lose their jobs. -- OMG. i even scared myself. i can only imagine what he must have been thinking i meant with that. and do you know what he said after my first bit of explaining myself? and the jobs thing? he said that the guy i have been thinking and TOLD was the owner of this place -- is NOT. that, among other things he - the maNseusse told me - was a LIE. a way of 'protecting' himself? after he told me that? i sang like a damn canary !!!! told him the only reason i hadn't told anyone before this was cuz i thought he was the owner, and i didn't want people to lose their jobs ! he said he would have the 'new' manager call me around noon. she did. about 1230 actually. i tried to have her talk to soulman... he didn't know what to say - so i ended up with the phone anyhow--- and ended up friggin crying.. with both of em.. the first guy and her. bleh. who knew? i knew i didn't wanna talk about it-- but i didn't know it would make me friggin CRY. good Lord. so, of course, she feels terrible about all of this, and is tryin to make it all right etc. i explain to her how many times i had told different people to freeze and/or cancel my account -- to no avail.. etc... then of course -- the deets of ASSHOLE. this doesn't seem to 'surprise her-- but she does want a lot of details. which i can't seem to really get into. if ya know what i mean. all i can say is "inappropriate ,m and unproffessional" etc. but it still even just that much makes me cry like a bitch. finally, i ask her -- have there been more complaints about him... i can tell by her tone of voice -- it almost even sounds pat tense when she talks about him-- there have been others-- but she can't tell me. i knew i wasn't the only one .. but from the sound of it -- i think this bastart went too far with the wrong person -- other than just me -- got his ass turned in.. and it costs that business to go under. they didn't 'move'. they got shut down, and are moving customers to another place. sound about right to you? that fucker needs to - and i hope he gets arrested ! i bet i'm not the only one that fell for the -- oh he's the owner- people will lose their jobs' thing. finally someone didn't give a damn and spoke up ! well, good for her ! whoever she is.

it was a rough couple hours for me- but it looks like i will be gettin my money back -- after refusing the free massage she offered -- oh really -- no thanks - i'll live the rest of my life without another masssage thank you. only thing i'm left wondering is this ---- will i be called in at a later date to testify against mr. molester in court? ugh. i would do it -- but now i know i'll freakin cry.

on that happy note? i must foragefor fooood.

maybe i'll come back later. maybe i won't.

what are y'all doin today?

i need a re-fill

i also need some friggin glasses, that i can see out of. geesh. maybe i'll actually make that appointment soon. seein as i'm goin to one dr. or another every other day lately anyhow. i really can barely see. i swear it gets worse by the week too. for several months i've been waitin for soulman to get his glasses before i get mine. has he got his yet? noops. he did get his prescription. just not his glasses. so, as i get more and more blind -- his rx, sits behind a magnet on the refrigerator door. i can't wait any longer. not one more week. monday -- ok maybe tuesday - due to the 'procedure' on monday... tuesday , if he hasn't done somethin-- or even if he has -- i have to make my eye appointment. my rx, is at least two or three years old -- trifocals -- and they just don't even come close to working anymore. i must get re-checked and get new glasses. it's not fun to be unable to see, read, do business, etc. especially when i have been filling out as many forms and such as i have been lately.

ok, i'll get moovin on now.

sorry for that last little rant -- but this friggin -explorer' font won't go big like mozilla. or if it does -- it goes back to small, every time i change anything. does it make me mad? you know it does. - tear-

do any of y'all watch the TV series Saving Grace? ever since i got Netflix a few weeks ago -- i have literally become addicted to that show. i had never watched it before. i got netflix, and have in a matter of maybe 3 weeks wiped out the ender first three seasons. i have one last disc on the way. it could have anywhere from one to four shows on it. the last disc on the last couple seasons had one or two shows on em. i hope this one will have more. i just can't get enough of that show. i think maybe in some way i can relate to 'grace'. i also think i have 'claimed my own Earl". recently -- like within the last day or two. go ahead call me crazy. i don't mean that i see or talk to an angel. not a 'real one' at least. but i did acknowledge 'my earl' walking into one of these damn appointments -- the one yesterday i think. i know mary, and jamie, and a couple others really can relate to all this medical shit. the questions, the waiting, the wondering, and the asshat doctors who honestly seem to not care- or notice what we as chronic patients of one thing or another actually live with on a daily basis-- and how a simple comforting answering -- good or bad -- just to be treated like an adult - and to be acknowledged that we are talking of our own body -- might be nice once in a while. why they treat our own lives as a secret sometimes isn't right. i've seem to come to realize , that as much as i hate it -- my answers lie and will be found on autopsy. therefore told soulman, have an autopsy -- but do not, under any circumstance, look at me afterwards. have me cremated. obviously i won't know if he does that-- but if he doesn't i KNOW in my heart -- he will regret it if he does.

OMG -- sorry.wanna know what i PLANNED on writin?

let's start over k?

HI GUYS!

what's up peoples.
my coffee's cold and almost gone. sure wish i had a minion to get me a re-fill :))
come on in and smoke with me !

anybody do anything last night?
we did. we took soulkid and soul-boy-toy -- that name is just no good --* note to self - find better bf name.
took them to dinner and a movie. good and fun evening. we ate at macaroni grill. and we watched ---- inception. with decaprio and ellen page - and many other 'stars' in it. it was - i hate to admit - a bit over our heads. we talked about it afterwards. it was a 'good' movie. it was just kinda -- i don't know -- scientific??? somethin like that. it was a thinkin movie. but it's worth seein, i guess. good special effects, and acting, of course. i don't know what to tell ya -- i spose since most my buds here are women? wait for the DVD? yeh. how bout that. save some money, but do see it.

ummm... now what? AHA-- i saw somethin in world market the other day when me and soulkid went bummin around town. last weekend? maybe? i wanted to buy it.. but i was flyin on the cheap that day, and i really thought it was over- priced. i immediately thought of my pal 'debbie' :))
i'm sure the damn pic is gonna post at the very top and not let me move it down here -- so i won't even upset myself about it -- so the monkey up top belongs HERE. so Debbie -- one day when i feel rich -- i'mm gonna get him for you :)) hope ya like him. i do !

anyhow folks . i had a rough nite sleepin last night -- have a feelin today will require a nap. i'm already thinkin i'm up before the birds so i may go pond fishin before it gets hot. of course my fuel light came on yesterday when i pulled into the driveway :(( that may change things. but maybe not- i could use somethin to drink, and have nuthin here. other than that? it's cleaning day at the soulcrib !! woo hoo !

hope y'all have happy saturdays !

and a very happy birthday to my eldest nephew -- he turns the big 3-0 today :))
benna benna benna - come sit on da poach !!!!!

i'll take a raincheck wez ... maybe in arkansas eh?
love you!

howdy folks - is it friday yet?

what's happenin in your world peoples? hope it's all goin smoothe and well. happy too?

here? hmmm. pretty much the same as usual, for lately. cept the fact that it looks like i just need to get used to usin 'explorer' for anything blog related. no. i am not happy about that. i also realize there's not much i can do about it either. so, i shall adapt. if i do anything well, adapting is at the top of my list. like a cat i spose. my entire life has been about 'change'. so much so -- if i were around back in the day -- i could have authored "The Serenity Prayer".

(which BTW - if F'N explorer worked the way mozilla DID - i would have put RIGHT HERE)

but as you can see -- i can't post on mozilla. i have to post on explorer -- which i am sure many of YOU do, and have done since the beginning of time. i bet y'all don't have these issues. do ya? bet y'all cut and paste, copy and cut and paste, all day long. huh? well... not me. don't ask me why either. cuz i can't tell ya why. soulman just spent at least an hour trying to fix this issue with my computer. to no avail. obviously. all 'we' came to discover? is that it involves 'google analytics' - and it is damn near impossible to get rid of. he tried and tried, to the point of gettin too irritated to go any further - for the time being. i don't even know WTF google analytics IS, save the fact that the only thing i have problems with on mozilla is BLOGGER. the main thing i use on here. the other being my banks and bills - occasionally facebook. my main contact with the world outside my front door is right HERE. with y'all. and some damn 'bug' or somethin has to mess up all of it and piss me off. ERG. i don't like bein pissed off. i like it when i can be all lalalalala and dumbassy. ya know? i hate to be all serious and angry all the time. it's just not how i want to be. and right now i don't need this shit. i need the distraction of bein a 'nut' as one of my pals calls me. it doesn't take much to entertain me. but lately i have been just wound too damn tight. so much so -- i backed out on plans to go on the boat and fish today. it's gotta be a first for me. well.. i prolly have done it before - but i bet only if i was sick or somethin. today i just have the blahs. plus --

i had the belly MRI this morning. it went alright. only thing that bothered me was i kept havin to hold my breath -- and folks i tell ya -- this smokin for most of my life has surely done me NO favors at all. i kept thinkin that if i were to ever 'drown' i'd go fast. i didn't count or anything, but really she pushed me to my limits of how long i could hold my breath, that's fo shizzle. it almost hurt at times.

anyhow--- i'll let ya know what they say when i hear back. she did tell me to drink a lot of water today though- and during the test - same as the one last week - i got an IV.. so i kinda figured along with that and the bah hum bugs today - why put myself in a situation where i might dehydrate? right. so as i write this i do wish i were fishin.. but it is pushin 100 degrees this afternoon, i'm kinda happy to be inside .

i would like to say that THIS was my final medical rodeo for a while. sad to say it was not. i mentioned the neck problems in one of recent posts - maybe the last one? well... i am scheduled for a "occipital block", for this coming Monday. can't wait. yeh. that's sarcasm. i haven't even googled it yet. sounds painful. also, i have researched that set of nerves and muscles a million times over the last few years. (occipital nerves, etc). they control and manage a LOT of what we do-- mainly without thought. like SEE. walk. move our hands and feet. and so much more. i have to go three times. prolly over the next six weeks. monday obviously #1. am i nervous? you bet yer ass i am. that's why i haven't 'seen' dr. google yet. i worry enough already. what if i go blind? what if i can't move my head? what if it HURTS for WEEKS or MONTHS - like the rhizotomy did? what if it ruins my plans to go to visit my family in arkansas? i haven't seen my nephews in a very long time! what if i am able to go - but can't DO anything? this is not to mention that each needle i take is costing us 150.00 ! plus -- i figured out that THIS is the place that wants near 350.00 .. and unfortunately, NOT the place that i paid 303.00 to right before TN. nope THAT went to the place that just did the belly scan. i'm just screwed y'all. i am in a pit of medical and financial HELL.

and ya know what else? i just realized i'm hungry. my neck fuckin hurts! my house looks like hell ran thru -- 180090 times! i have been crying almost daily for five days -- for things i would laugh at on any other day. i am crawling under rocks that i hurl at someone on any other day. what is happening to ME guys?

is it age? pain? fed - up-ness? i'm t-i-r-e-d. of e-v-e-r-y-t-h-i-n-g.

just love meh.

spose i'll feed my face and check up on you folks in a bit.

hope you all are happy in your worlds today --

it IS fried-day !!! whooooooT

happy weekends to you -

well i'll be . . .

this belongs with the facebook post

but explorer won't copy / paste

delightful. no?

it's a pain in my ass, but it looks like i can post. only thing is - i gotta do it on explorer. i hate explorer. WTF is up with my mozilla? i don't know either. but i can tell ya this much -- if YOU are havin the same issues? i solved the problem. switch to explorer - and the problem is solved. ugh. why can't anything be easy in my world? why is it always bullshit? even the little irritating things. things like this. a damn blog? no one else in the world would think this to even be an issue in their life. would they? would you? really. i'm askin. whoever's readin, i'm askin.


or how 'bout 'this' --- today i get a call. actually two calls. one is an easy fix. i hope. i am pretty sure i can get outta payin it , cuz i am all caught up and it's from this current year. so- no biggie. just irritating. a while later ? yup - another friggin DR's office (billing , of course) calls me. says i owe them .. OVER 300.00 !! i'm stunned. whaddabuncha crap! just before we left for TN some OTHER dr place called and i DID shell out over 300.00 -- i don't even remember who it was to or what it was for - not to mention the correct amount that i even paid !!! but i paid it. i do remember that it had somethin to do with one of these tests i'm doin/done. i really hope it's this place. i don't have another 300.00+ to shell out. shit. ugh. it HAS to be this place. right. can't be coincidence that i owed two out of three places the same or close to it amounts. could it?


bah !



ok. i'll move on. but i'm pissed off about that. i'm pissed off about a few things at the moment actually. BUT.. i reckon they aren't what i should be focusing on right now. right?



then you tell me. what should i be focusing on ? hmmm? well - there's always the massage place -- that 'crossed the line'. then AFTER i verbally, and in an email, cancelled my account - STILL took money from my checking account. wanna talk about that? the money cleared BTW. i've been hoping -- i guess that they would find their error and reverse the charges. but ya think that happened? noop. do ya think i have the teets to call and 'confront' them? i do not. i don't know which angle to start from. i don't know who to speak with. which tone to start with. i don't know shit. all i know is that i, personally, do not want to deal with this situation - AT ALL.



i also know - they owe me almost 200.00 in charges that they continued to take -= after i began asking them to 'freeze my account' .. prior to this 'incident'. BLEH




so anyhow --- looks like i got off at the wrong stop folks. someone peed in my wheaties. sorry 'bout that. mood swing attack... oops. i was actually in a decent mood when i began this post. then the phone thing --- the call i got right after i got on here just kinda set me off-- i don't know why- it's an ongoing thing. just another heap on the flames i reckon. i'll get over it.



anyways -- for anyone who doesn't use facebook.. or may have missed it? the last few days i've been usin facebook cuz i couldn't post here--- so first i will say - today i got the results of my thyroid ultrasound -- it was good. whatever that means. just that nothing has 'changed'. so ok.



other than that? i reckon -- here's the latest in the medical realm of soulland - might be other stuff - not sure- have a read -- but get a coffee and a couple cigs first :))







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FACEBOOK POST

(insert soul-shirt pic here :))


blogger is bein a pain in my A** ! it will not let me post - or even load the post page. ERG. so. i will tell y'all here. in about 2 hours or so, i will be sittin in my neurologists ofice, listening to the details of the report of my recent brain MRI. i would be lying if i said i wasn't concerned. ok fine. worried, about what i may hear. if blogger is working when i get back, i will post the 'report'. among a few other things. the symptoms i have been having over the last month though-- are real reasons for concern. i really don't think it's something fatal. i do think it's something that will not 'heal' though. which i will admit , scares me.
if you have seen the movie 'The Notebook." you'll know why i say that. i'll be seein ya. oh - and this is for my long term blog friends -- especially JAMIE :)) do y'all remember the 'soul-shirt?' i deverginized it yesterday ! it don't look 'so' bad.


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- what the freakin frackin froo is UP with blogger? is it only me? my computer? i'm pretty upset about it - whatever it is. i cannot go without blogger. i just can't. y'all know how MY mind works. maybe ya don't. i don't really know how it works either. what i do know - is that i must write. a lot. facebook doesn't have the ... space i need to babble the way i do. WTH? can y'all post on blogger today? it seems some have. i haven't been home long, so haven't had a chance to look around. but i think it's simply cuz i am ME. as usual. SO, anyhow. i'll TRY to keep it short . haha i know right. it's a task, but i will really TRY. the dr. seems to be optimistic to the fact that nothing too serious is goin on. he said the 'infarct', lesion, scar, whatever -- was caused -- most likely by the damn chronic migraines. over 20 years of them. he didn't explain 'how' , just his theory. so i'll take that over a stroke or anyeurism any day ! wouldn't you? i'm pretty sure that has a lot to do with my memory - or lack thereof - issues. best guess havin. didn't ask though. my research, and pretty much common sense tells me - dead tissue in a human brain would certainly cause some type of problem, dontchya think? and i do have many. mainly no memory, sayin the wrong word, mis spellin basic words, things like that. then we have the headache from hell.... i think that question was pretty much answered - and hopefully soon will be taken care of. on the c-spine (neck) MRI -- there were several new things found - that i haven't heard of - on me - to date. so it could very well be the root cause of the 6 week long headache and MORE. there is a bulging disc at c-3 and 4. AND c- 5 and 6 ! there are 'spurs' all over the damn place -- and stenosis everywhere. (narrowing.) NOW i don't feel like such a big baby. i feel pretty damn tough actually. most folks woulda laid down and died by now. not me... cuz i am soul. and i got soul. and i got y'all to keep me goin. i bet i woulda laid down and died , months ago if not for y'all. i hope you know that. not a single one of you have a hint of what you mean to me. i wish ya did. cuz you are all angels in my world. my guardian angels. you give me strength, you make me laugh, you give me a reason to find humor in my medical mystery of a pain ridden life. really. i have no reason to make this shit up. you are the wind beneath my wings :)) me and my sis have been sayin that to each other since the movie 'Beaches" came out. aside from me sayin it the other day -- i never said it to anyone else. but i'm sayin it now-- to all my peeps. you know who you are. and i love ya. thanks for watchin out for me guys. happy hectic humpday -- looks like you're stuck with me . for a while
anyhow. love , souliolio


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ok guys -- i give up -- i'm gonna watch the final episode of 'saving grace on season 3.
then i shall stuff my face -- of with what? i have no idea.
then i think i'll call it ni-night time.
belly MRI is tomorrow - 8 a.m. sharp.
wanna make bets on the number of ulcers?
bleeding- or- not?
i'll throw a 20.00 in there - 3 bleeding ulcers is my bet.
here's a heads up-- last one said 'bleeding ulcers - no # and NEVER use aspirin for the rest of your LIFE!
hint- for the last six weeks i been eatin excedrine migraine like CANDY-
but until then -- stopped altogether.
you read here?
do the math :))

g'nite my friends
<3>

is there anybody out there?

holy crap - i think it's working !!! woo hoo !!

i'll be back later :((

i had to get on the desktop - then tried 'explorer' - deleted the damn chinese spam.. and voila !
here i am ! did ya miss me ?

i been updating on facebook - i will transfer that to here in a minute -- IF my laptop will work now (for blogger)

anyhow-- i must go, and pretend to be productive today.

laterz